The best accountant jokes

Q: What's a shy and retiring accountant? A: An accountant who is half a million shy and that's why he's retiring.
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has 63.17 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: accountant, money, old people, work
Q: How many cost accountants does it take to change a light bulb? A: Hmmm... I'll just do a few numbers and get back to you.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: accountant, light bulb, math, work
Q: What do you call a group financial controller who's lost his job? A: Bob.
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: accountant, money, work
Q: Why does Santa have an accountant in the USA? A: So he can avoid Gift Taxes.
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: accountant, geography, money, Santa, tax
Q: What do actuaries do to liven up their office party? A: Invite an accountant.
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has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: accountant, office, party
Some American academics, discussing the Six Day War with an Israeli general, were eager to know how it had ended so quickly. The general told them, "We had a crack regiment at the most sensitive front. It was made entirely of lawyers and accountants. When the time came to charge - boy, did they know how to charge!"
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has 55.71 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: accountant, college, ethnic, money, war
Q: What do you call a trial balance that doesn't balance? A: A late night.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: accountant, time
It's 4:04. Do you know where your auditor is?
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has 49.51 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: accountant, time
A wife to her husband as they watch their young son playing: "He's such a sensitive child. Let's wait until he's older before we tell him you're an accountant."
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has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: accountant, age, husband, kids, wife