The best age jokes

Yo momma is so old that her first Christmas was the first Christmas.
Vote: has 66.77 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, Christmas, time, Yo mama
A Pontiac takes examinations for the driver’s licence for the fourth year in a row. The examiner asks him "So, you’re running on the street. You have a mountain on your right and there’s a cliff on your left. There are two women in your way; the one young and the other an old woman. Which one are you going to hit?" "Of course the old woman!" The examinet frustrated "I told you last year! You hit the brakes!"
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, car, life, old people, women
At the age of 17, Chuck Norris was fired from his job in a car factory because he roundhouse-kicked a car in half.
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, car, Chuck Norris, work
You know you're getting old when Santa starts looking younger.
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A three year old little boy was examining his testicles while he was bathing. "Mom", he asked, "is that my brain?" "Not yet", she answered.
Vote: has 66.64 % from 42 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, kids
Q: What 80's rock band is banned from New Orleans and why? A: The Scorpions. Every time they're in town, they rock you like a hurricane.
Vote: has 66.46 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, geography, music, weather
Chuck Norris is not 70 years old. At age 60, he began getting younger. This is why he is actually only 50.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, Chuck Norris
My nookie days are over My pilot light is out What used to be my sex appeal Is now my water spout. Time was when, on its own accord From my trousers it would spring But now I've got a full-time job To find the blasted thing. It used to be embarrassing The way it would behave For every single morning It would stand and watch me shave. Now as old age approaches It sure gives me the blues To see it hang its little head And watch me tie my shoes.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, beauty, time, work
A man asked his wife, "What would you most like for your birthday?" She said, "I'd love to be ten again." On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and they went to a theme park. He put her on every ride in the park - the Death Slide, The Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear. She had a go on every ride there was. She staggered out of the theme park five hours later, her head reeling and her stomach turning. Then off to a movie theater, popcorn, cola and sweets. At last she staggered home with her husband and collapsed into bed. Her husband leaned over and asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being ten again?" One eye opened and she groaned, "Actually, honey, I meant dress size!"
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, birthday, fat, marriage
"I just had sexed in school today, dad! You lied to me! You told me if I have sex before my 16th biurthday, my boyfriend will die." "Oh, he will, sweetheart, he will."
Vote: has 66.27 % from 73 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, birthday, dad, kids, sex