The best age jokes

There was an old married couple who love each other very much. But each morning as he was waking up the husband let out a huge nasty wet fart with his wife right in the bed next to him. The wife always says "One day you're going to fart your guts out if you don't stop." Then one day the wife snapped she won't take it anymore and she got up extra early when downstairs and got the guts out of a turkey and put it in the bed behind. She went back downstairs to wait and then she heard the loud disgusting fart all the way down the stairs and then she hears nothing for a long while. Just as she's about to go upstairs and check on her husband he comes stomping down the steps and he says "Honey you were right after I get my guts out but with the grace of God and these two fingers I managed to shove them back up there again."
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has 53.58 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: age, disgusting, fart, life, marriage
Did you hear Cher is joining the spice girls? They're going to call her Old Spice.
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has 53.58 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: age, dirty, music, old people
Leeroy is talking to his parents about his problems: "Mummy, whenever I try to play with the white boys and girls, they always call me a nigger - why is that? "Well," replies his mum, "that's because you are black." "And mummy, why do the teachers shout at me and tell me to go away, but they are nice to the white boys and girls?" "Well," replies his mum, "that's because you are black." Then Leroy grins and says "Well, whenever I'm in the shower with the white boys I notice that my penis is much bigger than their penises." "Well," replies his mum, "that's because you are 37."
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has 53.40 % from 210 votes. More jokes about: age, black people
If you're under the age of 25 and you think your life sucks then you better brace yourself.... Life has only given you the TIP of its Dildo.
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has 53.37 % from 127 votes. More jokes about: age, life, sex
Little Johnny was sitting in class one day and he really needed to go to the bathroom. He yelled, "Teacher, Teacher, I have to go pee pee!" The teacher replied, "Now, Johnny, you should be old enough to know that this is not the proper word to use?" "The correct word would be urinate." "Now Johnny, would you please use the word urinate in a sentence?" Little Johnny thought for a moment then said:, "You're an eight, but if you had bigger boobs you'd be a ten!"
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has 53.05 % from 133 votes. More jokes about: age, communication, little Johnny, teacher
A college math professor and his wife are both 60 years old. One evening the wife comes home and finds a note from her husband. It says: "My dear, now that you are 60 years old, there are some things you no longer do for me. I am at the Holiday Inn with my 20-year-old student. Don't bother waiting up for me." He returns home late that night to find a note from his wife: "You, my dear, are also 60 years old and there are also things I need that you're not giving me. So, I am at the Motel 6 with one of your 20-year-old students. Being a math professor, I'm sure you know that 20 goes into 60 way more than 60 goes into 20. So, don't YOU wait up for ME."
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has 53.05 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: age, college, marriage, math, wife
Yo mama's feet are so ashy, it looks like she kicks flour for a living.
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has 53.04 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: age, insulting, life, Yo mama
John: How old are you? Peter: Hmmm..I'm 7 John: You know what, when I was your age, I was also 7.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: age, kids
A lion was getting rather old and slow and having difficulty catching its prey. It decided it needed a disguise so that other animals did not know it was a lion and would not run away. So it goes into a fancy dress shop and buys a gorilla suit. It then heads for a watering hole to see if it can catch something with its new disguise. On the way it comes across two eagles sitting on a rock. One eagle says to it "Hi Mr. Lion!" The other said, "Where did you get the gorilla suit?" The lion, rather frustrated, asks, "How did you know I was a lion?" The eagles then started to sing, "You can't hide your lion eyes".
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: age, animal
You are so old, you fart dust.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: age, fart, insulting
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