The best age jokes

Two guys are talking about their boss's upcoming wedding. One bloke says, "It's ridiculous, he's rich, but he's 95 years old, and she's just 24! What kind of a wedding is that?" The other says, "Well, we have a name for it in my family." "What do you call it?" "We call it a football wedding." The first asks, "What's a football wedding?" The other says, "She's waiting for him to kick off!"
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has 45.58 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: age, family, sport, wedding
An old Jewish beggar was out on the street, begging with his tin cup. A man passed by and the beggar said to the man, "Sir, could you spare 3 cents for a cup of coffee?" And the man said, "Where do get coffee for 3 cents?" And the beggar said, "Who buys retail?"
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has 45.35 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: age, jewish, money
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
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has 45.29 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: age, Chuck Norris, death
A number twelve walks into a bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer. "Sorry I cant serve you," states the barman. "Why not?!" asks the number twelve with anger showing in its voice. "Youre under 18," replies the barman.
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has 45.29 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: age, alcohol, bar, bartender, beer
Q: What did the baby owl's parents say when he wanted to go to a party? A: "You're not owld enough."
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has 45.29 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: age, baby, bird, communication, party
What's the difference between an old cat and a baby kitten? An old cat scratches and bites but a little pussy never hurt anybody!
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has 45.10 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: age, animal, cat, kitty
Chuck Norris got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.
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has 44.95 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: age, Chuck Norris, time
A single woman who retired just a few months back walked up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch in her neighborhood. "I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she said. "What's your secret for a long happy life?" "I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day," he said. "I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise." "That's amazing," the woman said. "How old are you?' "Twenty-six," he said.
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has 44.13 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: age, alcohol, life, old people, women
A young woman for whom a marriage with an old man was being arranged by her parents refused to go through with the ceremony because as she put it, " I don't want to feel old age creeping on me!"
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has 43.73 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: age, marriage, women
Three grandsons of ex Army Men were boasting about their grandfathers. "My great grandfather," one declared proudly, "made the army proud by joining the army at the age of 12." "Mine," boasts another, "got 12 bravery medals." "He was the only soldier in my family," confessed the third one, "but if my great grandfather was living today he'd be the most famous man in the world." "Really? What'd he do?" his friends wanted to know. "Nothing much. But he would be 152 years old."
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has 43.61 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: age, family, military
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