The best airplane jokes

There are 3 men on a plane a Mexican an American and a Russian the Mexican says "I hate my country!" And throughs a soup out the window the American says "I hate my country" and throughs a pie out the window. The Russian says "I hate my country!" And throughs a bomb out the window. Then the plane lands and the Mexican sees a kid crying the Mexican says "what's wrong kid?" The kid says "a soup fell on my mom's head and she burnt to death." "I didn't do that" says the Mexican. The American was walking and saw a kid crying "what's wrong kid?" The kid says "my mom was driving and a pie fell on her windshield and drove off a cliff cause she couldn't see!" "I didn't do that" says the American. Then the Russian gets off the plane and saw a kid laughing his head off. The Russian says "what's so funny?" The kid says " daddy farted and the house went BOOM BOOM!"
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has 57.70 % from 89 votes. More jokes about: airplane, black humor, kids, mexican, travel
Q: Who was the first cat to fly in an airplane? A: Kitty-hawk
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has 57.17 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: airplane, cat, kitty
Q: What do bleached blondes and airplanes both have in common? A: They both have a black box.
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has 56.98 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: airplane, blonde, stupid
What do an airport and a illegal abortion have in common? The Hanger.
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has 56.22 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: airplane, black humor
There were four people on a plane. One of them, the Pilot. The other was the president of the United States –Obama, The oldest man in the world, and a little boy. The plane was about to crash and the only option for survival was to jump! But there were only three parachutes. The Pilot took a parachute and said, "I'm the pilot, so I should get a parachute." And he jumped off. Then Obama grabs a and jumps saying, "Since I'm the president, I get one too!" And he jumps. The little boy then grabs a parachute and hands it to the old man. The man declines, saying, "No, boy, take it. I'm too old anyway." The boy answers, "What? No! Obama took my back-pack!"
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has 53.62 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: age, airplane, black humor, political, stupid
Chuck Norris put his phone on air-plane mode and flew it.
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has 53.56 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: airplane, Chuck Norris, phone, travel
An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passengers take their seats and get prepared for an emergency landing. A few minutes later, the pilot asked the flight attendants if everyone was buckled in and ready. “All set back here, Captain,” came the reply, “except the lawyers are still going around passing out business cards.”
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has 53.04 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: airplane, business, lawyer
Three guys are on a plane, ones black, ones white, and ones Mexican. The pilot says: "there's to much weight you all need to throw something off the plane." The black guy throws his Jordan's and says: "we have to many of these in our country" The Mexican throws off his lawn mower and says: "we have to many of these in our country". The white guys throws the Mexican and says: "we have to many of these in our country"
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has 51.63 % from 226 votes. More jokes about: airplane, mexican, racist, white people
Q: What do u call 1,000 black people on a plane back to Africa? A: A good start.
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has 51.37 % from 216 votes. More jokes about: airplane, black people, geography
While we all get checked by the airport security, Chuck checks the airport security.
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has 50.96 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: airplane, Chuck Norris
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