The best alcohol jokes

A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
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has 29.01 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
Beer: helping ugly people have sex since 3000 BC!
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has 29.01 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
Harry, to Tom: ‘I went to the dentist this morning.’ Tom: ‘So does your tooth still hurt?’ Harry: ‘I don’t know; he kept it.’
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has 29.01 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
He used to drink so much, Gordon’s thought he was a wholesaler.
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has 29.01 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
It’s late evening and Tom’s wife catches him pouring six cans of lager down the toilet. ‘What on earth are you doing?’ she says. Tom replies, ‘Well, it seems a waste, but I thought it’d save me getting up in the night.’
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has 29.01 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
One night Harry had been drinking so much he came home and was sick all over the cat. He looked down at it and said, ‘I don’t remember eating that.’
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has 29.01 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
Tom is walking home from the pub late one night when he takes a short cut across a cow field. Halfway across he drops his hat. He has to try on fifty others before he finds it again.
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has 29.01 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
A very short painter walks into a Parisian bar and offers to buy his friend a drink. His friend, rushing out of the door, shouts, ‘Can’t stop now, no time Toulouse.’
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has 29.01 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" "Ach," says the Irish man, "it's drivin' me nuts!"
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has 29.01 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, bartender
A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says: ''Pint please, and one for the road.'
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has 29.01 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
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