The best animal jokes

Why couldn't the cow leave the farm? She was pasteurized.
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Why don't cows ever have any money? Because the farmers milk them dry.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk? An udder failure.
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I hear you take milk baths. That's right. Why? I can't find a cow tall enough for a shower.
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What did one dairy cow say to another? Got milk?
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Q: What do you call cattle with a sense of humor? A: Laughing stock.
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What animals do you bring to bed? Your calves.
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How do you make a milkshake? Give a cow a pogo stick.
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Did you hear about the snobby cow? She thought she was a cutlet above the rest.
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"Did you hear about the farmer who lost control of his tractor in the cow pasture?" "No." "Did he hurt the cows?" "No, he just grazed them."
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