The best baby jokes

Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again? When the kids are in college.
Vote: has 70.48 % from 142 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, college, kids, marriage, wife
A logician's wife is having a baby. The doctor immediately hands the newborn to the dad. His wife asks impatiently: "So, is it a boy or a girl" ? The logician replies: "yes".
Vote: has 70.03 % from 79 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, dad, doctor, math, wife
Stonehenge was made by Chuck Norris stacking blocks as a baby.
Vote: has 69.30 % from 50 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, Chuck Norris
What do you name an Asian baby with problems? Sum ting wong.
Vote: has 69.25 % from 190 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: asian, baby, racist
Q: What is the difference between baby and knitting? A: Knitting is weaved by two needles and one ball, but the baby has been made with one needle and two balls!
Vote: has 69.25 % from 136 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, black humor, morbid
Kim and Kanye naming their baby North West is just like Brad Pitt naming his kid Arm.
Vote: has 69.19 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, celebrity, life, music
What do you call a baby potato? A small fry.
Vote: has 69.19 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, food
Q: What's the idea of a blonde of natural childbirth? A: No make-up.
Vote: has 69.19 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, beauty, birthday, blonde
Mama Raptor and Papa Raptor were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Raptor a choice of which parent to live with. JUDGE: "Do you want to live with your mother?" BABY RAPTOR: "No! She beats me." JUDGE: "OK, then you can live with your father." BABY RAPTOR: "No! He beats me too!" JUDGE: "Well you have to live with someone. Who do you want to live with?" BABY RAPTOR: "I want to live with my Aunt Bertha in Toronto." JUDGE: "Is there any chance she'll beat you also?" BABY RAPTOR: "No sir. The Toronto Raptors don't beat anybody."
Vote: has 66.98 % from 57 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, baby, dinosaur
Q: What did the blonde do when she found out she was pregnant with triplets? A: She went looking for the three guys.
Vote: has 66.96 % from 35 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, blonde, sex, stupid


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