Q: What's brown and white and flies all over? A: Thanksgiving turkey, when you carve it with a chainsaw!
Dad tries to persuade his son to eat the egg he has prepared for him: "Eat your egg my child to become as big as daddy!" "I do not want," says the little one. "Eat it my boy to become strong and powerful." "I’m telling you, no!" insists the youngest. "My dear son eat your egg to make your bird grow." And the mom from the inside "George, you eat the egg… I’ll make burgers for the kid!"
Yo' Mama is so poor, she steals her breakfast from backyard bird feeders.
Q: Where do birds meet for coffee? A: In a nest-cafe!
Chicken to turkey: "Only Thanksgiving and Christmas? You're lucky, with us it's any Sunday."
Men call us birds, is that because of all the worms we pick up?
Q: What's a good holiday tip? A: Never catch snowflakes with your tongue until all the birds have gone south for the winter.
Q: What do you get if you cross a duck with a firework? A: A firequaker!
Q: Why do birds fly south in the winter? A: Because it's too far to walk!
A couple of pigeons made a date to meet on the ledge on the tenth floor of a skyscraper. The female was there on time, but the male arrived an hour late. "Where were you? I was worried sick." "It was such nice day, I decided to walk."