The best blonde jokes

Q: Why can't a blonde dial 911? A: Because she couldn't find the 11
Vote: has 69.24 % from 222 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: blonde, math, phone
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead team were sent out to install telephone poles for the Telephone Company. After the first day, the brunette team had installed 30 poles, the redhead team had installed 37 poles, and the blonde team had installed 7. The contractor was outraged with the blonde team and demanded to know why they had done so few. "Hey, we saw what the other teams were doing. Their's were still sticking out of the ground."
Vote: has 69.19 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: blonde, ginger, phone
A blonde goes into a store and sees a shiny object on the shelf. She asks the clerk, “What is that shiny object?” The clerk replies, “That is a thermos.” The blonde then asks, “What does it do?” The clerk responds, “It keeps hot things hot and it keeps cold things cold.” The blonde says, “Oh! I could use something like that! I’ll take it!” The next day, as she walks into work with her new thermos she spots her boss and shows off her shiny new thermos, “I just got this yesterday, isn’t it wonderful! It’s a thermos and it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold!” The boss asks, “And what do you have in it?” The blonde replies, “Some coffee and a popsicle.”
Vote: has 69.19 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: blonde
Q: What do you say to a Blonde that won't give in? A: "Have another beer."
Vote: has 69.19 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: beer, blonde
Q: What's the idea of a blonde of natural childbirth? A: No make-up.
Vote: has 69.19 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, beauty, birthday, blonde
Q: What is a blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears? A: She's trying to hold on to a thought.
Vote: has 69.19 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: beauty, blonde, stupid
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all enter a swim meet. The gun goes off, and the brunette quickly captures first, with the redhead coming in second. An hour later, the blonde emerges from the pool and complains to the judges that while she was doing the breast stroke, the others were using their arms.
Vote: has 68.80 % from 25 votes. Send joke:
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A blonde and a brunette walk past a flower shop and see the brunette's boyfriend buying flowers. She sighs and says, "Oh crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again. Now, I'll be expected to spend the weekend on my back with my legs in the air." The blonde says, "Don't you have a vase?"
Vote: has 68.66 % from 45 votes. Send joke:
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A brunette and a blonde are walking in the park. The brunette asks: "Hey can you see that forest over there?" The blonde looks that way and answers: "I can't, the trees are covering the view."
Vote: has 68.66 % from 45 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: blonde, stupid
A blonde's redhead decides to show her a neat way to trick people. You put your hand on a wall and ask someone to punch it. But before they do, you pull your hand away! "That is a neat trick," thinks the blonde, and tries desperately to remember it, but isn't all too successful. Despite this, she decides to try it out on her blonde friend. "Okay," she says, "I'm going to put my hand in front of my face..."
Vote: has 68.63 % from 29 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: blonde


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