The best blonde jokes

Two blondes lock their keys in the car. One of the blondes tries to break into the car while the the other one watches. Finally the first blonde says "Darn, I can't get in the car!" The other blond replies, "keep trying, it looks like it is going to rain and the top is down".
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More jokes about: blonde, car, weather
Why can’t blondes make ice cubes? They forget the recipe.
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Q: How do you know a blonde's having a bad day? A: Her tampon's behind her ear and she can't find her pencil...
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A blonde walks into a gas station and says to the manager, "I locked my keys in my car. Do you have a coat hanger or something I can stick through the window to unlock the door?" The manager gives the blonde a bent coat hanger. A few minutes later, he goes out to check on her. As her approaches the blonde working the hanger in window, he notices another blonde inside the car, coaching "No, no! A little to the left."
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A blonde goes into a store and sees a shiny object on the shelf. She asks the clerk, “What is that shiny object?” The clerk replies, “That is a thermos.” The blonde then asks, “What does it do?” The clerk responds, “It keeps hot things hot and it keeps cold things cold.” The blonde says, “Oh! I could use something like that! I’ll take it!” The next day, as she walks into work with her new thermos she spots her boss and shows off her shiny new thermos, “I just got this yesterday, isn’t it wonderful! It’s a thermos and it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold!” The boss asks, “And what do you have in it?” The blonde replies, “Some coffee and a popsicle.”
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Q: What is a blondes' reaction to hearing "drinks are on the house". A: Where's the stairs.
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More jokes about: alcohol, blonde
Did you hear about the blonde that stayed up all night to see where the sun went? It finally dawned on her.
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More jokes about: blonde, science, stupid
Q: What is a blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears? A: She's trying to hold on to a thought.
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More jokes about: beauty, blonde, stupid
Q: A brunette, a blonde and a redhead are all in fifth grade. Who has the biggest tits? A: The blonde, because she's 18.
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More jokes about: age, blonde, ginger, school
Once a blonde wanted to go to her boyfriend's home. Her mom advised her: "My sweet whenever your boy friend wanted to touch your pants tell him there is a hot oven so your hand will burn." Next day her mom asked her daughter: "Had you a good day?" The blonde answered: "It was the best day in my life because when my boyfriend touched my pants I told him: 'There is a hot oven and your hand would damage!' But he urged me that I've one hot dog and I wanna to cook it for several times he put his hot dog in my pants and then he put it in my mouth for confident whether it has been cooked or not."
Vote: has 67.84 % from 66 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, dirty, relationship, sex, stupid