The best blonde jokes

Walking through Chinatown, a tourist is fascinated with all the Chinese restaurants, shops, signs and banners. He turns a corner and sees a building with the sign, "Hans Olaffsen’s Laundry." "Hans Olaffsen?", he muses. "How the heck does that fit in here?" So he walks into the shop and sees an old Chinese gentleman behind the counter. The tourist asks, "How did this place get a name like 'Hans Olaffsen’s Laundry?'" The old man answers, "Is name of owner." The tourist asks, "Well, who and where is the owner?" "Me, is right here," replies the old man. "You? How did you ever get a name like Hans Olaffsen?" "Is simple," says the old man. "Many, many year ago when come to this country, was stand in line at Documentation Center. Man in front was big blonde Swede. Lady look at him and go, 'What your name?' He say, 'Hans Olaffsen.' Then she look at me and go, 'What your name?' I say, 'Sem Ting.'"
Vote:
has 71.18 % from 309 votes. More jokes about: asian, blonde, food, life
Q: What do SMART Blondes and UFOs have in common? A: You always hear about them but never see them.
Vote:
has 71.15 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde is driving a helicopter and it crashes. When the police come and ask the blond what happened she says, "I got cold so I turned off the big fan!"
Vote:
has 70.99 % from 133 votes. More jokes about: blonde, cop, driving, stupid
Q:Why did the blonde have a triangular coffin? A:Because as soon as her head hits a pillow she spreads her legs!
Vote:
has 70.92 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all enter a swim meet. The gun goes off, and the brunette quickly captures first, with the redhead coming in second. An hour later, the blonde emerges from the pool and complains to the judges that while she was doing the breast stroke, the others were using their arms.
Vote:
has 70.84 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q: Why do blondes have "TGIF" on their shoes? A: "Toes go in first."
Vote:
has 70.43 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q: What do you say to a Blonde that won't give in? A: "Have another beer."
Vote:
has 70.40 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: beer, blonde
Q: Why do blondes have see-through lunch box tops? A: So they can tell if they are going to work or going home, while on the bus.
Vote:
has 70.40 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: blonde, communication, food, travel, work
Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat. The driver blonde turned to her friend and said, "You know,it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!" To this, the other blonde replies, "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
Vote:
has 70.39 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde's house is on fire. She runs outside and yells, "Help me! My house is on fire! What do I do?!" Someone else yells, "Call 911!" The blonde yells back, "What's the number?"
Vote:
has 70.18 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: blonde, phone, stupid
<<<19202122
More jokes →
Page 19 of 79.