Q: Why was the blonde having trouble sleeping?
A: She forgot to close her eyes.
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Q: How many blonde jokes are there?
A: One. The rest are all true stories.
What’s five miles long and has an IQ of forty?
A blonde parade.
Q: What do you call it when a blonde dies her hair brunette?
A: Artificial intelligence.
What did the blonde say when someone blew in her bra?
‘Thanks for the refill.’
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox.
She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house.
A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox and again opened it, and slammed it shut again.
Angrily, back into the house she went.
As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.
Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?"
To which she replied, "There certainly is!"
My stupid computer keeps saying, "You've got mail!"
There are 2 women getting ready to leave for work.
The brunette gets in the driver's seat and the blonde gets in the passenger's seat.
The brunette says: "We're late, so you watch out the back window for cops." As she speeds down the road she asks the blonde:
"So, do you see any cops?"
The blonde replies: "Yes!"
The brunette says: "Are they behind us?"
"Yes!"
"Are they close?"
"Yes!"
"Are they going to stop us?"
"I don't know!"
"Well, are their lights on?"
The blonde replies: "Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no...!
A blonde was swerving all over the road and driving very badly, so she got pulled over by a cop.
The cop walked up to her window and asked, "Miss, why are you driving so recklessly?"
The blonde said, "I'm sorry sir, but wherever I go, there's always a tree in front of me and I can't seem to get away from it!"
The cop looked at her and said, "Lady, that's your air freshener!"
A blonde was headed to Detroit.
She got on the plane and sat down in first class.
A few minutes later, a flight attendent came up to her and told her that her ticket was for coach and she had to move from the seat.
She refused.
The flight attendent was persistant, but the blonde replied, "No, I want to sit here, I've always wanted to see what it is like in first class."
The flight attendent was getting frustrated.
Finally, after quite some time, she convinced her to move.
Another passenger who overheard the conversation asked the attendent, "How did you get her to move?"
The flight attendent replied, "I told her that first class doesn't stop in Detroit."
Q: What do Barbie and Paris Hilton have in common?
A: Both are blonde, brainless and made out of plastic.