The best blonde jokes

Q: Why aren't blondes good cattle herders?  A: Because they can't even keep two calves together!
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Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up?  A: To catch everything that goes over their heads.
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A blonde and a brunette were talking one day. The brunette said that her boyfriend had a slight dandruff problem but she gave him "Head and Shoulders" and it cleared it up. The blonde asked inquisitively: "How do you give shoulders?"
Vote: has 64.73 % from 105 votes. Send joke:
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What does a blonde do when her laptop computer freezes? She sticks it in the microwave.
Vote: has 64.72 % from 36 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: blonde, computer
Two blondes decide to go duck hunting. Neither one of them has ever been duck hunting before and after several hours they still haven't bagged any. One hunter looks at the other and says, "I just don't understand it, why aren't we getting any ducks?" Her friend says, "I keep telling you, I just don't think we're throwing the dog high enough."
Vote: has 64.72 % from 36 votes. Send joke:
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Q: Why did the blonde have blisters on her lips? A: From trying to blow out light bulbs.
Vote: has 64.52 % from 46 votes. Send joke:
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How do you break a blonde's nose? Place a dildo under a glass table!
Vote: has 64.28 % from 25 votes. Send joke:
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A blonde and a redhead are taken hostage by terrorists. The women are taken to a remote island and put before a firing squad. Just before the squad fires, the redhead points and yells, "Tornado!" The terrorists run in all different directions, and the redhead escapes. When they realize what has happened, the terrorists come back to where the blonde is still standing. They raise their rifles, and thinking quickly, the blonde points and yells, "Fire!
Vote: has 64.05 % from 42 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: blonde, terrorist, women
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blond female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back in the house. A little later she came out and again went to the mail box, opened it and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" she replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps saying, 'YOU'VE GOT MAIL.'"
Vote: has 63.82 % from 35 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: blonde, computer, men, stupid
A blonde, a red head, and a brunette were on a plane. The red head takes a bite of an apple doesn't like it she throws it out the window. The brunette takes a bite out of an orange doesn't like it she throws it out the window. The blonde takes a bit of a bomb doesn't like it she throws it out the window. They get out of the plane. They come up to a little boy asks why he is crying! he says "An apple fell on my dog and killed my dog." They keep walking and come up to a little girl and asks why she is crying. She says" An orange fell on my cat and killed my cat." They keep walking. They come up to a blonde laughing her head off. "Why are you laughing so hard?" they said. "When I farted the building blew up!"
Vote: has 63.81 % from 142 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: airplane, blonde, food, ginger


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