The best blonde jokes

A bloke walks into a bar in the bush to discover a 44 gallon drum almost overflowing with $20 notes. He sits at the bar and orders a beer. A short while later one of the locals gets up, throws $20 into the drum and walks out the back. He soon returns shaking his head disgruntled and sits down. Five more minutes pass when another local does exactly the same. The bloke asks the bartender what is the go with the drum full of 20's . The bartender says that they have a donkey out the back that has never laughed in its life. So you simply throw in the $20 and have a go, if the donkey laughs then the drum and its contents are yours. Been going ten years so far. The young bloke gets up, throws his 20 into the drum and proceeds out the back.  Within seconds the donkey his laughing its head off.  As he strolls back inside all the locals ask what he did but he won't say and simply takes the drum full of cash and leaves. 10 years goes past and the young bloke decides to pay the pub another visit. This time he sees a drum overflowing with $50 notes in the middle of the room. He goes up to the bar tender and asks again what the deal is with the drum. The bartender says that they have the same donkey still out the back and seeing as he had made it laugh, the deal was you now had to make it cry but it was a 50 not a 20. The young bloke gets up, throws in his 50 and goes out the back. About a minute later the donkey is crying his eyes out and the young man returns to the bar. The locals beg him to tell them how he has done it as it has cost them a fortune attempting it. The young bloke says that to make him laugh he told the donkey his member was bigger than the donkeys. Everyone sighed and understood how easy that was and why didn't they think of it. Now they demanded to know what tactic he had used to make the donkey cry so miserably. The young bloke replied that it was quite simple as well, he just showed it to him.
Vote:
has 65.52 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, bartender, blonde, money
Did you hear about the blonde who brought her cosmetics with her for a make-up exam?
Vote:
has 65.48 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: beauty, blonde, school, stupid
Q: Why should you keep a blonde on the job 7 days a week? A: So you don't have to retrain them every Monday.
Vote:
has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: blonde, stupid, time, work
A blonde is standing in front of a soda machine outside a local store. After putting in sixty cents, a root beer pops out of the machine. She set it on the ground, puts sixty more cents into the machine, and pushes another button. Suddenly, a coke comes out the machine! She continues to do this until a man waiting to use the machine becomes impatient. "Excuse me, can I get my soda and then you can go back to whatever you are doing?" The blonde turns around and says, "No chance! I'm not giving up this machine while I'm winning!"
Vote:
has 65.08 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Two blondes are sitting on a bench at the park. One says to the other,"Hey, which is farther, California or the moon?" The other blonde says,"Well, duh! Can you see California?"
Vote:
has 64.93 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: blonde
How does a blond spell farm? E-I-E-I-O
Vote:
has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q: What happened when a blonde missed the Q44 bus? A: She took the Q22 twice.
Vote:
has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde complains to a brunette friend that her Internet is down. The brunette friend offers to let the blonde check her e-mail at her house. "That's OK," says the blonde. "Why don't you check it and forward me what I got?"
Vote:
has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: blonde
I looked into a blonde's eyes, but all I saw was the back of her head!
Vote:
has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?  A: Gifted!
Vote:
has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: blonde
<<<26272829
More jokes →
Page 26 of 79.