What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Translator.
Q: Why did the blonde go to the dentist? A: Someone dented her car.
Q: What is a blondes' reaction to hearing "drinks are on the house". A: Where's the stairs.
Q: Why was the blonde jogging backwards? A: She wanted to gain weight!
As a blonde crawls out of her wrecked car, the local sheriff asks her what happened. The blonde began, "It was the strangest thing! I looked up and saw a tree, so I swerved to the right. Then I saw another tree, so I swerved to left. Then there was another tree, and another and another ..." The sheriff thought for a minute and then said, "Mam ... I don't know how to tell you this, but the only thing even resembling a tree on this road for thirty miles is your air freshener."
A blonde returned home from work and was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She called the police immediately to report the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the channels and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out onto the porch. The sight of the cop and his dog made her shudder. She put her face in her hands as she sat down on the steps and began moaning. "What's the moaning all about, ma'am?" asked the officer. The blonde replied, "I come home to find all my possessions stolen, so I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a blind policeman!"
During her company's periodic password audit, a blond employee was found to be using this password: GoofyHueyLouieDeweyDaisyDonaldMickeyMinniePhoenix When she was asked why she had such a long password, she said, "The boss said that my password had to be at least eight characters long and have at least one capital."
Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain? A: After a dye job.
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead were stuck on an island for many, many years until one day they found a magic lamp. They rubbed it hard and out popped a genie. He said that he could only give three wishes so since there were three girls, each would get one wish. The redhead went first. "I hate it here. It is too hot and boring. I want to go home!" "Okay," replied the genie. And off she went. Then the brunette went. "I miss my family, my friends and relatives. I want to go home, too!" And off she went. The blonde started crying and said, "I wish my friends were back here!"
A blonde heard that milk baths would make her more beautiful, so she left a note for her milkman to leave 15 gallons of milk. When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 1.5 gallons, so he knocked on the door to clarify the point. The blonde came to the door and the milkman said, "I found your Note to leave 15 gallons of milk. Did you mean 1.5 gallons?" The blonde said, "I want 15 gallons of milk. I'm going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath". The milkman asked, "Do you want it pasteurized?" The blonde said, "No, just up to my boobs."