The best blonde jokes

I looked into a blonde's eyes, but all I saw was the back of her head!
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Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?  A: Gifted!
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Q: How do you brainwash a blonde? A: Give her a douche and shake her upside down.
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Q: Why aren't blondes good cattle herders?  A: Because they can't even keep two calves together!
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Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain?  A: After a dye job.
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Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up?  A: To catch everything that goes over their heads.
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Q: How are blondes like postage stamps? A: You lick'm, stick'em, and send'em on their way.
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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead were stuck on an island for many, many years until one day they found a magic lamp. They rubbed it hard and out popped a genie. He said that he could only give three wishes so since there were three girls, each would get one wish. The redhead went first. "I hate it here. It is too hot and boring. I want to go home!" "Okay," replied the genie. And off she went. Then the brunette went. "I miss my family, my friends and relatives. I want to go home, too!" And off she went. The blonde started crying and said, "I wish my friends were back here!"
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A blonde was driving across several states to go visit her family. She was five hours late and her family was getting worried. When she finally got there she explained that she had seen 10 signs that said “CLEAN RESTROOMS AHEAD...”
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A midget is riding a bus when a blonde steps on him. “Hey you, brunette, watch where you're going,” yells the midget. The blonde looks down and says, “I am not a brunette, I am a blonde.” The midget replies, “Not from where I'm standing.”
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