Q: What do you call four Blondes in a Volkswagon? A: Far-from-thinkin.
What do you get when you cross a Mexican with an Asian? A car thief that can't drive.
Guy takes his wife to the Doctor... The Doc says, "Well, it's either Alzheimers disease or AIDS." "What do you mean?" The guy says, "You can't tell the difference?" "Yeah, the two look a lot alike in the early stages... Tell you what.. Drive her way out into the country, kick her out of the car, and if she finds her way back, don't fuck her."
"My wife drives like thunder." "So fast?" "No, every minute she strikes a tree."
A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other, the woman leans out of the window and yells "PIG!" The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "BITCH!" They each continue on their way, and ... as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road ... and dies immediately. If only men would listen...
Q: What do a gay and a garbage truck have in common? A: Both take it in the rear.
A car slows down at a stop sign and keeps driving. A cop sees him and pulls him over. The cop asks, "Why didn't you stop?" The man says, "I slowed down." The cop pulls out his nightstick and starts beating him. "Now," the cop says, "do you want me to stop or slow down?"
Chuck Norris doesn't need his seatbelt becouse no one is stupid enough to hit him.
Chuck Norris saved 100% on his car insurance by switching to Geico.
The economy got very bad in 2008. I saw a pimp driving a beat up old Volkswagon.