Did you hear Richard Simmons had plastic surgery to get his love handles removed? Yeah... now he has no ears.
Jason Bourne fought Chuck Norris but he can't remember because now he has amnesia.
Q: Why does Luke Skywalker always ask for favors? A: Because he needs someone to lend a hand.
Why did Steve Jobs live his last moments in regret? They say your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. Unfortunately for Steve Jobs, his iPhone 4S didn't have a Flash player installed!
Elvis Presley, Richard Petty, Budweiser, and Michael Jackson all call Chuck Norris "The King".
Chuck Norris is the reason why Professor X is on a wheelchair.
When Teddy Rosavelt said there is nothing to fear but fear itself he obiously hadn't met Chuck Norris.
Nothing beats a woman with a beautiful singing voice. Except for Chris Brown.
Jason Bourne is Chuck Norris' daughter...
Chuck Norris became famous when he coached the American rugby and America won the fifa world cup.