Bill Gates once asked Chuck Norris to be his personal body guard for an hour, he couldn't afford it...
Sylvester Stallone's son was found dead. I guess we have a good plot for the next Rambo movie now.
There is man sitting in a bar who is really, really drunk. When the bar closes he gets up to go home. He stumbles and falls couple of times and finally manages to get out of the door. As he gathers himself, he sees a nun passing by. He stumbles over to her and starts punching her in the face. The nun is shocked beyond belief, but before she could say anything, he leans over and punches her again. This time the nun hits the pavement. The drunk stumbles over to her, kicks her in the butt, picks her up and throws her against the wall. By now the nun is very weak and can barely move. He leans over her, grabbing her by the collar of her habit and says, "Not feeling too STRONG tonight, I thought you would be tougher Batman!"
When Bruce Banner's angry he turn into the Hulk. When the Hulk's angry he turns into Chuck Norris
How did Nicki Minaj know what Lil Wayne is giving her for Christmas? Lil Wayne isn't very good at wrapping.
Is Snoop serious? Or is Snoop Lion?
Chuck Norris does Rachel Marron's work.
Everybody loves Raymond. Except for Chuck Norris.
What is the difference between Harry Potter and a jew? Harry Potter escaped the chamber.
Lebron better than Jordan? Ha! Yea right. Talk to me when Lebron saves the looney tunes from an alien race.