Randy Johnson can throw a fastball 101mph. Chuck Norris can throw Randy Johnson 101mph.
Freddy Krueger has nightmares of Chuck Norris
Obama's health care plan won't cover injuries caused by a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to the face. Nobody would survive anyway.
If kim kardashian was a donut wat kind would she be? Chocolate filled.
Even the story of Sir Walter Ralegh confirms that he put his brand new coat over bumps with mud for his wife to cross it. Why? Because he was on sea for 15 months and he desperately wanted to have sex. No normal man that is well in his brains would do this to his expensive coat.
What famous painting do cows love to look at? The Moona Lisa.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Mickey mouse talks like that.
Chuck Norris does Rachel Marron's work.
If you say "alright" in the mirror 3 times Matthew McConaughey will appear and hand you a joint.
The only reason Osama Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...