Chuck Norris made Ellen Degeneres straight. 
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Q: Why did Arnold Schwarzenegger train on a desert island?
A: He wanted maximum isolation.
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Chuck Norris became famous when he coached the American rugby and America won the fifa world cup.
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Superman and The Flash have a race around the world.
Who wins?
Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris has proven Newton's third law of physics, there is no force equal to a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
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Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet.
The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
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Bruce Lee is the only person that lived from a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris.
He died a year later.
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There were 3 people on a boat, Chuck Norris, Jesus, and the Penelope, Jesus said
"I bet I can walk across the water."
He did, Chuck Norris tried, he did, the Penelope said
"They did it that means I do it." ,
He tried, he sank, Jesus said: "Should I have told him about the rocks?"
Chuck Norris said "What rocks?"
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The only reason Osama Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...
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Chuck Norris can block Mark Zuckerberg's Facebook account.
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