Q: What did Jesus tell the Mexicans just before he died? A: Act stupid until I get back.
The whole idea of Jesus dying to pay for our sins is bullshit. Jews don't pay for anything.
Jesus won't come back again. Why? Because he know you will kill him and see if he will wake up again.
Jesus walks into an inn and hands the innkeeper 3 nails and says "Can you put me up for the night?"
Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
I just recently discovered that there is a national holiday named after Atheism. April FOOLS day. Like this story in the name of Jesus.
Q: What happened to Jesus when he said "Catch me outside, how bout dat"? A: He got crucified