The best Christmas jokes

Q: What did the deaf, blind, mute girl get for Christmas? A: Cancer.
Vote:
has 34.42 % from 71 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Christmas, health
Your moms like a christmass tree all the guys put there balls on her.
Vote:
has 33.40 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, Yo mama
This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad. He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!
Vote:
has 31.97 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, Chuck Norris, kids, Santa
Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and its still printing.
Vote:
has 31.03 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, fat, technology, time, Yo mama
James and Neil were fortunate enough to have a season ticket to watch Manchester United. They could not help noticing that there was always a spare seat next (A16) to them and they had a friend who would love to buy a season ticket, especially if all three could have seats together. One half-time Neil went to the ticket office and asked if they could buy the season ticket for A16. The official said that unfortunately the ticket had been sold. Nevertheless, week after week the seat was still empty. Then on Boxing day, much to James and Neil's amazement the seat was taken for the first time that season. Neil could not resist asking the newcomer, 'Where have you been all season'. 'Don't ask' he said, 'the wife bought the season ticket back last summer, and kept it for a surprise Christmas present.'
Vote:
has 29.93 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, soccer, sport, wife
Your mamma so old that her first Christmas was the first Christmas when Jusse said his first words you a hoe.
Vote:
has 26.75 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: age, Christmas, Yo mama
What does a blind, deaf, quadriplegic baby can get for Christmas ? Cancer.
Vote:
has 20.48 % from 125 votes. More jokes about: baby, Christmas, disgusting, health
Yo mama so stupid that she mourned wen we slaughtered a goat for Cristmas.
Vote:
has 19.71 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: animal, Christmas, stupid, Yo mama