Chuck Norris is reading all these jokes and thinking to himself: They make me sound like a pussy.
Only Chuck Norris can dislike on Facebook.
The cops pulled Chuck Norris over for going 55 miles per hour on the freeway. But since he wasn't in a car, they had to give him a ticket for jaywalking.
Only Chuck Norris knows a bigger number than infinity, and it's not infinite plus one.
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. there were no survivors and the pilot episode tape has been burned.
Never tell Chuck Norris he lost the game because he will make you lose the game then roundhouse kick you in the face making you lose twice.
Chuck Norris will chuck you in the norris!
Chuck Norris knows the last number of infinity.