When Chuck Norris opens a bag of Doritos, it's fucking full!
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Chuck Norris can cross all Seven Bridges of Konigsberg, making all the current laws of Math, obsolete.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need photos, he takes mental pictures.
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When Chuck Norris makes a burrito, its main ingredient is real toes.
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Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
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Count from one to ten.
That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you... Forty seven times.
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If you say Chuck Norris' name in Mongolia, the people there will roundhouse kick you in his honor.
Their kick will be followed by the REAL roundhouse delivered by none other than Norris himself.
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If it walks like a duck, talks lidek a duck, and smell like a duck but Chuck Norris says it's a girrafe. It's a damn girrafe!
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The true reason why the Nazi's lost the war was because they stopped trying after they found out Chuck Norris had a summer home in Russia.
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Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
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