The best communication jokes

Gilding the lily is a job seeker's birthright. Here are a few doozies, where the applicant claimed: - to be a former CEO of the company to which he was applying. - to be fluent in two languages—one of which was pig Latin. - to be a Nobel Prize winner. - to have worked in a jail when he was really in there serving time. - he was fired "on accident."
Vote: has 66.60 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: communication, management, prison, stupid, work
Q: What did Snow White say to Pinocchio when she was sitting on his face? A: "Lie to me! Lie to me!"
Vote: has 66.60 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: communication, dirty, sex
An atheist was seated next to a little girl on an airplane and he turned to her and said, "Do you want to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger." The little girl, who had just started to read her book, replied to the total stranger, "What would you want to talk about?" "Oh, I don't know," said the atheist. "How about why there is no God, or no Heaven or Hell, or no life after death?" as he smiled smugly. "Okay," she said. "Those could be interesting topics but let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff – grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, but a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?" The atheist, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says, "Hmmm, I have no idea." To which the little girl replies, "Do you really feel qualified to discuss God, Heaven and Hell, or life after death, when you don't know shit?" And then she went back to reading her book.
Vote: has 66.49 % from 49 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: atheist, communication, god, religious
Pritam is driving down the Delhi-Amritsar highway when he spots his friend Shankar standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that Shankar is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing. Pritam gets out of the car, walks all the way out to Shankar and asks him, "Excuse me, what are you doing?" Shankar replies, "I'm trying to win a Nobel Prize." "How?" asks Pritam, puzzled. "Well, I heard they give the Noble Prize to people who are outstanding in their field."
Vote: has 66.46 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, communication, driving, friendship, stupid
When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens. And dies.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, communication, death
Q: What was the world's first palindrome? A: Madam, I'm Adam.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: bible, communication, history
Mission Statement: A long awkward sentence that demonstrates management's inability to think clearly.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: communication, management, stupid
Two men were talking: First : "Can U put the word 'penis' in a sentence?" Second: "Yo mama's pussy."
Vote: has 66.41 % from 87 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: communication, dirty, sex, vulgar, Yo mama
Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people don't notice when you replace words with random musical instruments.
Vote: has 66.10 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: communication, life, music, science
Yo mama told me that she had some wrinkles in her feet ; I suggested to wear stocking. She said : "Woo it is 50 years that I am wearing pants the chink of her ass hadn't been recovery!"
Vote: has 66.09 % from 76 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, communication, vulgar, Yo mama