The best communication jokes

Knock knock. Who's there? Hatch. Hatch who? Bless you.
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has 65.56 % from 140 votes. More jokes about: communication, knock-knock
Little Johnny: "I've piss may I go out?" Teacher : "Piss is an impolite word instead you say I've number 1." Jimmy: "May I go out? I want to shit." Teacher: "Shit is also a bad word it is better to use number 2 instead." Ronald: "There is a wind in my belly give me please a number for it."
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has 65.52 % from 127 votes. More jokes about: communication, disgusting, kids, teacher, vulgar
One day a fellow came into the bar with a cat, not just any cat, but a mean-looking ginger tom. You could see the scars from across the room. But that wasn't the weirdest thing; a six-foot ostrich - eyes like golf balls, followed them in - a real live ostrich! I asked the man what he wanted. "I'll have a pint of bitter," he said. "A pint of lager for the ostrich and a gin and tonic for the cat." The cat hissed at him. "Make that a double gin and tonic. Thanks." Well, I served the drinks, he paid, and they all knocked 'em back. Wasn't long before the ostrich came back to the bar, and made it clear that it wanted the same again. Well, I poured them. I could feel the cat's eyes burning through me as if he was checking that he got his double again. I took the drinks over to them, and the man paid, taking the cash from a purse tied around the ostrich's neck. This went on for a couple of hours. The man and the ostrich buying alternate rounds, while the cat just sat on the window shelf with his drink, looking fit to kill. The whole place got quiet. People sat and stared, and who could blame them? Eventually, I plucked up the courage to ask the fellow just what was going on. "Can't a man have a quiet drink anymore?" he rasped. So I said, "No harm meant, but you've got to admit that you're a unique set of drinkers. He smiled, but there was no light in that smile. "Okay, you want to know? I'll tell you." "I was across town the other week, working on the new road. Amid the dirt and the rubble, I turned up this old brass lamp. I rubbed it, thinking there might be a date or inscription or something. Anyway, out comes this cloud of smoke and a Genie appeared. You know - turban, scimitar, and the whole works. And he tells me I've got just one wish." "And before you ask, yes, I did wish for a long-legged bird with a tight pussy. But this wasn't what I had in mind."
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has 65.24 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: bar, cat, communication, dirty, genie
A man has came over to his wife in a request. She tells him to tie her to a bed and do whatever he wants. 3 hours later he is fucking hookers and watching football and porn with friend.
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has 65.20 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, men, sex, wife
Q: What did the valentines day card say to the stamp? A: Stick with me and you'll go places.
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has 65.20 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: communication, travel, Valentines day
A waiter walks up to a table of old ladies eating their lunch and asks, "Is anything OK?"
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has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, food, mean, old people
A boastful hunter kept telling his buddies the same story, and they chided him for telling it over and over. He reminded them that they often tell the same stories. "Not so," said one friend. "We re-share, you repeat."
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has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: communication, friendship, hunting
Q: What was the world's first palindrome? A: Madam, I'm Adam.
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has 65.14 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: bible, communication, history
A man walks into a clock shop where a beautiful woman is working. He walks to the counter unzips his fly and pulls out his cock. The woman screams "excuse me sir this is a CLOCK SHOP". I know replied the man "I want two hands and a face put on this".
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has 64.94 % from 150 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, men, sex, women
I would tell a joke about a bed, but it hasn't been made up yet.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: communication
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