The best communication jokes

A piece of sandpaper walks into a bar. The bartender says "What will it be?" The sandpaper goes "Just something to take the edge off"
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has 62.50 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: bartender, communication
Drunk guy gets pulled over. Officer starts doing sobriety tests on him. The final test the officer says "if you can pass this last test I will let u go... use the words green pink and yellow in 1 sentence." So the drunk man replies "My phone went green and I pinked it up and said yellow. Have a nice day officer!"
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has 62.50 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: communication, cop, drunk
The following conversation took place after a recently deceased Pakistani man knocked on the gates of Heaven for about 5 minutes. St. Peter: "What do you want? " Pakistani man: "I'm here for Jesus." St. Peter: "Jesus, your taxi's her!! "
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has 62.43 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: christian, communication, ethnic, heaven, time
I just had an argument with a girl I know. She was saying how that it's unfair that if a guy fucks a different girl every week, he's a legend, but if a girl fucks just two guys in a year, she's a slut. So in response, I told her that if a key opens lots of locks, then it's a master key. But if a lock is opened by lots of keys, then it's a shitty lock. That shut her up.
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has 62.43 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, men, sex, women
Your Moma is so fat the only words she knows is the universe.
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: communication, fat, Yo mama
It was the standard series of check-in questions that every traveler gets at the airlines counter, including, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" "If it was put there without my knowledge," I asked, "how would I know?" The agent behind the counter smiled smugly. "That's why we ask."
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, travel
If you understand English, press 1. If you do not understand English, press 2.
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has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service
A man is in a mall and sees a clothes store. He sees a magnificent, brand new jacket in the shop window and decides he shall try it on and buy it. So he walks into the shop and asks an employee: "Excuse me sir." "How can I help you" the employee replies. "Could I by any chance try on that jacket in your shop window?" The employee looks at him and says "No you shall not you are to try it on in the changing rooms like everybody else!"
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has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: beauty, communication, customer service, men
Teacher: "What does a duck say?" Jenny: "Quack Quack" Teacher: "What does a cow say?" Madison: "Moo" Teacher: "What does a pig say?" Little Johnny: "A pig says *holds up gun* get on the wall, you motherfucker!"
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has 61.96 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: animal, communication, kids, little Johnny, vulgar
Me: "Will you Remember me in a day?" Her: "Yes." Me: "Will you remember me in a week?" Her: "Yes." Me: "Will you remember me in a month?" Her: "Yes." Me: "Will you remember me in a year?" Her: "Yes." Me: "Ok, I have a joke. Her: "Ok." Me: "Knock, knock." Her: "Who's there?" Me: "You didn't remember me."
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has 61.95 % from 85 votes. More jokes about: communication, knock-knock, memory, relationship
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