The best communication jokes

Three women were debating about how wide their pussy are. The first one said: "When my husband makes sex he puts his penis and his testicles in my pussy." The second lady said: "Wooo when we are in bed my husband puts his hand and his arm in mine." It was the turn of the third woman that pointed to her pussy and said: Jimy; Jimy come out, please."
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has 82.86 % from 1180 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, sex, women
The barbershop was crowded, so the woman at the cash register offered to put my name on the waiting list. "What is it?" she asked. "Stephen, with a P-H," I said. Minutes later, a chair opened up, and my name was called: "Pheven?"
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has 82.83 % from 93 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, stupid
The wife and I had come to town to pick up a few things. We came out of one store and saw a cop writing a ticket for illegal parking right in front of us on the curb. So we asked him nicely to give a couple of retirees a break. But he paid us no attention and kept writing. Just loud enough for him to hear, my wife said, "What a Bozo." The cop looked up, stared at my wife, then started writing out another ticket. I said, "Honey, this guy probably just learned to read and write, and he's so proud of himself, he's showing off." The cop tore off the 2nd ticket and started on a third. We kept making comments and he kept writing tickets till he was up to about half a dozen. Finally, glaring at us, the cop left, and we walked on down the street. We didn't care about the tickets. We always take the bus into town, and anyway, that car was one of those obnoxious Hummers. Being retired, we always try to find ways to keep ourselves amused. We feel it's important.
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has 82.65 % from 99 votes. More jokes about: communication, cop, mean, old people, vulgar
English Class Teacher: "One day we will be corruption free. Which tense is it?" Student: "Future impossible tense."
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has 82.29 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: communication, money, school, student, teacher
Wife: "Give me some money. I want to buy a bra." Husband: "Why? You have nothing to put in it!" Wife: "You wear shorts!"
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has 82.19 % from 130 votes. More jokes about: beauty, communication, marriage, mean, money
A priest asks Johnny if he's scared of Satan. Little Johnny says "I have nothing to be scared of you are the one that must be scared; you talk crap about him every Sunday..."
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has 82.05 % from 200 votes. More jokes about: communication, little Johnny, priest, religious
A woman noticed her husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. "Ha­­! That's not going to help," she said. "Sure, it does," he said. "It's the only way I can see the numbers."
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has 81.83 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: communication, fat
A man gets the words 'I love you' tattoed to his penis. He goes home and shows his wife. His wife says, "Don't try to put words into my mouth!"
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has 81.63 % from 1117 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, love, wife
Innkeeper: "The room is $15. a night. It's $5. if you make your own bed." Guest: "I'll make my own bed." Innkeeper: "Good. I'll get you some nails and wood."
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has 81.60 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, money, travel, work
Q: What is a difference between Ooooh and Aaaah? A: Only 3 inches.
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has 81.59 % from 442 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, sex
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