The best communication jokes

Two lawyers were walking along negotiating a case. "Look," said one, "let's be honest with each other." "Okay, you first," replied the other. That was the end of the discussion.
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has 79.27 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: communication, lawyer
"Hey Bill... Do you talk to your wife while you are having sex?" "Only if there's a phone handy", Bill replied.
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has 79.24 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: communication, phone, sex, wife
English Class Teacher: "One day we will be corruption free. Which tense is it?" Student: "Future impossible tense."
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has 79.06 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: communication, money, school, student, teacher
A priest and a nun were on a mission trip up in the mountains when a snowstorm Came up. They saw an abandoned log cabin and went inside. The priest started a fire in the fireplace and found blankets and a sleeping bag but only one bed. The priest told the nun that she could sleep on the bed and he would sleep in the sleeping bag in the floor. As they were alone and beginning to get settled. The young nun said, "father?" in a song-song voice. He answered, "yes, sister?" "I'm cold." The priest got up and went to the closet and got another blanket and covered the nun. As he was settling back into his sleeping bag, she again said, "father?" "Yes, sister?" "I'm still cold." The priest got up and got another blanket from the closet and added it to the sisters' bed, tucking her in. He climbed back into the sleeping bag. Just as he was getting settled and the fire was crackling she called out to him again. "I'm still cold!" He said, "sister?" "Yes?" "We are all alone out here in this cabin in the mountains." "Yes, we are!" "Just this once... Yes? Just tonight... yes? Do you want to pretend that we are married?" "Oh yes! I do!" "Ok... get up and get your own dang blanket!"
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has 79.06 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: communication, marriage, mean, priest, weather
When teacher entered the class little Jonny slowly said: "Sir excuse me; your zipper is open." So the teacher thanked him and fastened his zipper. He went near little Jonny and told him: "My dear it would better to say: the office door is open." Next day when the teacher entered the class, unfortunately, his zipper was again open! Little Jonny loudly shouted: "Not only the office door is open but also the teacher is at the door and two small students are beside him."
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has 78.90 % from 153 votes. More jokes about: communication, kids, little Johnny, teacher
Me using the Siri app on my iPhone: Me: "Siri, call my wife." Siri: "Samantha McLaughlin is not in your contacts." Me: "Samantha Gibbs is my wife." Siri: "I've added Samantha Gibbs as your wife." Me: "Call my wife." Siri: "Which wife?"
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has 78.86 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: communication, phone, stupid, technology, wife
When I arrived at a hotel in order to fill in my identities I noticed the word "sex" so I wrote: YES PLEASE.
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has 78.85 % from 158 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, sex, travel
Honestly, Officer, I wouldn't have pulled over had I known you were just going to criticize me.
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has 78.77 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: communication, cop, driving
My wife told me, "Don't get upset if someone calls you fat." "You're much bigger than that."
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has 78.77 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: communication, fat, mean
Wife: "There's something preying on my mind." Husband: "Don't worry, it'll soon die of starvation."
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has 78.59 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: communication, marriage, mean
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