The best cop jokes

You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
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has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: cop
A murder has been committed. Police are called to an apartment and find a man standing, holding a 5-iron in his hands, looking at the lifeless body of a woman on the ground. The detective asks, "Sir, is that your wife?" "Yes." "Did you hit her with that golf club?" "Yes. Yes, I did," the man answers. He stifles a sob, drops the club and puts his hands on his head. "How many times did you hit her?" "I don't know. Five...six ...put me down for a five."
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has 38.91 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: cop, wife
Microsoft Office doesn't correct Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris correct Microsoft Office.
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has 38.22 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: computer, cop
How many cop jokes are there? Just two, all the rest are true!
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has 37.27 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: cop
A blonde phoned police to report that thieves had been in her car. "They've stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, even the accelerator," she cried out. However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time and the same voice came over the line. "Never mind, I got in the back seat by mistake."
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has 37.03 % from 105 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, cop, phone
A blonde phoned police to report that thieves had been in her car. "They've stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, even the accelerator," she cried out. However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time and the same voice came over the line. "Never mind, I got in the back seat by mistake."
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has 36.90 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, cop, phone
What did the policeman say to his belly button? You're under a vest!
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: cop
I had a knock at my door earlier, it was a policeman… “Mr Cook?” “Yes,” I replied. “I’m afraid your dog has just been reported to have chased someone on a bike.” I said, “That’s bullshit – my dog doesn’t have a bike!”
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, cop, dog
1st thief : Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window! 2nd thief: But this is the 13th floor. 1st thief : Hurry! this is no time for superstitions.
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has 36.09 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: cop
Q: Did you hear Lorena Bobbitt was almost killed in a traffic accident? A: Some dick cut her off.
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has 36.09 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: cop
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