The best death jokes

My aunt died, God bless her, at a ripe old age of 104. We called her Aunt Tique.
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has 74.94 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: age, black humor, communication, death, family
Chuck Norris had to stop washing his clothes in the ocean. The tsunamis were killing people.
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has 74.94 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
While we were working at a men's clothing store, a customer asked my coworker to help her pick out a tie that would make her husband's blue eyes stand out. "Ma'am," he explained, "any tie will make blue eyes stand out if you tie it tight enough."
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has 74.78 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: beauty, black humor, customer service, death, work
One day, a blonde and her friend were walking through the park. Suddenly, the blonde's friend said, "Oh, look, a dead birdie!" The blonde looked up and said, "Where?"
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has 74.71 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: bird, blonde, death, stupid
Death: It's your time. give me your hand Blonde: No! i know that if i dont touch you then I'll never die! Death: Holy shit! You figured out the key to living forever! You're soooo smart! High five! Blonde: *high fives* Death: Typical blonde... Dumbass...
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has 74.46 % from 1604 votes. More jokes about: blonde, death, stupid
Chuck Norris will never die. The Grim Reaper is too scared to come and claim him.
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has 74.43 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
If someone ever intimidates you, remember that they're 70% water. Are you scared of water? Well you should be. 400,000 people drown per year.
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has 74.43 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: death, life
Eleven year old’s environmental studies essay on the effect of oil pollution: "When my mum opened a tin of sardines last night it was full of oil and all the sardines were dead."
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has 74.27 % from 102 votes. More jokes about: age, death, school
During an English lesson, the teacher notices that a boy was not paying attention to him. Teacher asks, "Johnny, join these two sentences together. I was cycling to school. I saw a dead body." Little Johnny after thinking for a while says, "I saw a dead body cycling to school."
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has 74.25 % from 326 votes. More jokes about: death, little Johnny, school, teacher
My Chinese friend died recently, So Yung.
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has 74.23 % from 292 votes. More jokes about: asian, death, ethnic
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