Death once took Chuck Norris.
He regreted it.
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What’s the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead black person in the road?
There’s skid marks in front of the skunk.
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Q: What's the best way to talk to a velociraptor?
A: Long distance!
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When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens.
And dies.
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Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car?
A: Three in the back, two in the front and the rest in the ashtray.
Q: How does an English man know that his wife has died?
A: Sex is still the same but the dishes are stacked in the sink.
A mathematician, physicist and economist after Titanic crash on uninhabited island in the middle of Atlantic ocean.
Starving to death they found a can of roastbeef.
They start debating how to open the can without can-opener.
Mathematician suggests to drop the can from the cliff to open it.
Physicist proposes to heat the can on bonfire.
Economist: "Let's suppose the can is opened...."
If Chuck Norris killed Kenny, he'd stay dead.
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Chuck Norris actually died a while back.
Death just can't get the nerve to tell him.
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Finally, they discovered real cause of Bruce Lee's death – extreme exhaustion from fight with Chuck Norris.
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