If looks could kill they would be called Chuck Norris.
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Batman is to Robin as Chuck Norris is to Death.
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Two rabbis prepare to wash the cadaver of a recently deceased before burying him, according to a Jewish tradition.
The deceased possessed a tremendous sexual organ.
Aaron, you see what I am seeing?
Yes Jacob, I see it... it is as mine.
That long?
No, that dead.
The list of names at the end of every Chuck Norris film is the list of people he's killed.
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If Chuck Norris killed Kenny, he'd stay dead.
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Did you know the Dinosaurs crossed Chuck Norris?
But only once.
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Q: What do you call a flying Jew?
A: Ashes.
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Chuck Norris' beard can etch a sketch a picture of chuck killing a man.
When the last line is drawn, that man dies!
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Mary Clancy goes up to Father O'Grady after his Sunday morning service, and she's in tears.
He says, "So what's bothering you, dear?"
She says, "Oh, Father, I've got terrible news. My husband passed away last night."
The priest says, "Oh, Mary, that's terrible! Tell me, Mary, did he have any last requests?"
She says, "That he did, Father..."
The priest says, "What did he ask, Mary?"
She says, "He said, "Please, Mary, put down that damn gun..."
Chuck Norris can kill you as many times as he wants to.
He knows CPR.
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