Babe when I die I want you to cremate me, pour my ashes into a bowl of chili, and eat me just so I can tear that ass up one more time!
Q: Why did the mathbook kill himself? A: Because nobody understood him.
Q: What's the difference between Santa Claus and Jews? A: Santa comes down the chimney.
Roses are red tulips are black. You'd look great with a knife in your back.
Death once took Chuck Norris. He regreted it.
Chuck Norris was once part of a knock knock joke. The Joke ended abruptly when after the first knock the door blew up killing the man behind it.
The real reason Hitler killed himself is because he found out that Chuck Norris is Jewish.
Q: How does an English man know that his wife has died? A: Sex is still the same but the dishes are stacked in the sink.
Yo mama so stupid... she died of starvation in a grocery store.
Q: What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children? A: If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!