The best dirty jokes

What's long, hard, and shoots sticky white stuff? A penis. What were you thinking you clean minded bastard.
Vote: has 56.73 % from 125 votes. Send joke:

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Listening to censored hip-hop is like going to a whore for a hug.
Vote: has 56.66 % from 66 votes. Send joke:

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How do you f*ck a fat chick? Roll her in flour and find the wet spot.
Vote: has 56.50 % from 42 votes. Send joke:

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Boy - "dear Santa, for xmas, I would like a baby brother." Santa - "Send me your mother."
Vote: has 56.20 % from 39 votes. Send joke:

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The pregnancy report of Santu’s wife came. Doctor said, "Oh, nothing to get excited, it was just the gas problem." Santu looks up at the sky towards the God and says, "Lord, What have you given me, a penis or an Air Pump."
Vote: has 56.16 % from 60 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, doctor, Santa, wife
Daughter: Dad, this guy told me the sweetest thing ever. Me: What's that hunny? Daughter: He said I had nice bumper lights, and a nice trunk. Me: Tell that niggie if he fills up your gas tank, I'll break his exhaust pipe, ya dig?
Vote: has 55.78 % from 62 votes. Send joke:

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Sure, I love to cook, but that doesn't mean I'm against eating out.
Vote: has 55.57 % from 41 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What did the prick say to the balls? A: You guys hang around here while I go inside!
Vote: has 55.37 % from 46 votes. Send joke:

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What do dogs and women have in common? They both like 12-inch bones.
Vote: has 55.19 % from 38 votes. Send joke:

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Me - Can you go to your moms room? Friend - Yeah, why? Me - I left my pants in there. Friend - Fuck you!
Vote: has 54.83 % from 53 votes. Send joke:

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