There was a guy and he went to the doctor and he showed the doctor his dick. He asked why it was orange and the doctor replyed: Have you been doing anything unusual? And he said: No. So the doctor ran so tests then he sent the guy home told him to come back in 2 weeks. So he did and it was even oranger so once again the doctor asked: Have you been doing anything at all unusual? And the guy said: Well about 2 weeks ago I was watching porno and eating a bag of crunchy cheetos.
Q: Why does a squirrle swim on its back? A: To keep its nuts dry
A son is discussing funeral arrangements with his dying mother. ‘Would you like to be buried or cremated?’ asks the son. The mother replies, ‘I don’t know. Surprise me.’
Nothing spreads easier than butter, except for yo mommas legs.
What comes after 69? Mouthwash.
Monday – a very, very, good day! The leader’s daughter lost. We found her and all of us made sex with her. Tuesday – a very, very, good day! The leader's wife lost. We found her and all of us made sex with her. Wednesday – a very, very, very, very, very, very, bad day! ... I lost! … Now they're looking for me.
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told her twice.
Q: Why shouldn't girls wear skirts in winter? A: Because their lips will get chapped!
I need your help making a cream sauce.
What do you say to a virgin? Thanks for nothing!