The best dirty jokes

I see you ordered the most expensive item on the menu for our first date. I hope you realize that it comes with a side order of my dick.
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has 60.84 % from 125 votes. More jokes about: dating, dirty
Q: Why doesn't Smokey the bear have any kids? A: Because every time his wife gets hot, he covers her with dirt and beats her with a shovel.
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has 60.73 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: dirty, kids, wife
I'm an astronaut and my next mission is to explore Uranus.
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has 60.73 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt, sex, work
Two rednecks, Bubba And Billy Bob, were walking through a pasture. Bubba sees a sheep caught up in a fence and says to Billy Bob "I'm gonna get me some of that"! Bubba goes over and sticks the sheep's back feet in his rubber boots, unzips his pants and starts to have sex with the sheep. He looks over his shoulder at Billy Bob and says "Do you want some of this"? Billy Bob replies "yes let me see if I can get my shirt caught up in the fence".
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has 60.73 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, redneck, sex, stupid
Q: How do you know a blonde just lost her virginity? A: The crayons are still sticky.
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has 60.69 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: blonde, dirty, disgusting, sex
A guy picks up a pr*stitute and proceeds to spend a couple of hours with her at a seedy motel. A few days later, he finds that he has caught crabs. He chases down the prostitute and says, "hey bitch, you gave me crabs". She replies, "what'd you expect for ten bucks? Lobster?"
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has 60.66 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Remember my name, because you'll be screaming it later!
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has 60.65 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt, memory, sex, time
Bully: Your dick is probably like a tic tac. Geek: No wonder your mom's mouth is so fresh. Class: Oooooohhhh!
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has 60.65 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: dirty, insulting
Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm in love but not with you... When we broke up you thought I cried But all it was... Was another guy, You told your friends that I was a trick, I told mine that you had a weak dick... I said I loved you And you thought it was true, But guess what baby?! You got played too!
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has 60.54 % from 110 votes. More jokes about: dirty, insulting, love, mean, poems
Q: Why don't witches wear underwear? A: For a better grip on there broomstick!
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has 60.15 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: dirty
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