The best disgusting jokes

Q: Why did the gay man get fired from his job at the sperm bank? A: Drinking on the job.
Vote: has 72.62 % from 174 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, gay, work
After a recent football game, the team went into the locker room to get out of their uniforms and to shower. In the showers, Bubba noticed that Duke has a cork shoved up his butt-hole. So, Bubba asked, "Duke, why in the world do you have a cork up your butt?" Duke answered, "Last night when I was cleaning my antique brass lamps, a genie came out of one of them. The genie said that I had one wish. I was really startled and I replied, "No shit!"
Vote: has 72.56 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: communication, disgusting, football, genie
A businessman returns from the far east. After a few days he notices stange growth on his penis. He sees several doctors. They all say: "You've been screwing around in the Far East, very common there, no cure. We'll have to cut it off." The man panics, but figures if it is common in the East they must know how to cure it. So he goes back and sees a doctor in Pakistan. The doctor examines him and says, "You've been fooling around in my country. This is a very common problem here. Did you see any other doctors?" The man replies, "Yes a few in the USA." The doctor says, "I bet they told you it had to be cut off." The man answers, "Yes!" The doctor smiles, nods, "That is not correct. It will fall off by itself."
Vote: has 72.34 % from 56 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: business, disgusting, doctor
Why does the witch not wear panties when flying? Because she wants to get a better grip on the broom.
Vote: has 72.25 % from 294 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting
As she lay there dozing next to me a voice inside my head kept saying, "Relax, you are not the first doctor to sleep with one of his patients." But another voice kept saying, "Howard, you are a veterinarian."
Vote: has 72.07 % from 484 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, doctor, sex
How did Captain Hook die? He wiped his bum with the wrong hand!
Vote: has 72.04 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, disgusting, pirate
There was this guy who was sick,so he went to the doctor. The doc ran some tests and sent him home with some medicine. The next day the doctor called and the wife answered. "I'm going to need to run a few more tests", the doctor said. "I'm going to need a semen, urine and a fecal sample". After she hung up the husband asked, "What did the doctor say?" "He needs a pair of your underwear".
Vote: has 71.97 % from 89 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, doctor, drug, husband, wife
Q: Which of the following doesn't belong: wife, meat, eggs, blowjob? A: The blowjob. You can beat your wife, your eggs, or your meat; but you just can't beat a blowjob.
Vote: has 71.80 % from 145 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, food, wife
"Doctor, I have a problem..." "What’s your problem?" "I pee in my sleep, every night!" "Why?" "Oh, well... Every night, a little devil visits me in my sleep and asks me; “Did we pee today?”. "And, that’s it? The solution is so simple.. Listen to me! If the little devil comes again you’re gonna answer; 'Yeah, dude, I did!'" "And that will cut it off?" "Sure! Like a knife!" At night, the little devil showed up on the patient’s dream and whispered; "Did we pee today?" "Yeah, dude, I did!" said angry the guy. And little devil replied: "What about poop?"
Vote: has 71.64 % from 63 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, doctor
Q: How is a pussy like a grapefruit? A: The best ones squirt when you eat them.
Vote: has 71.49 % from 221 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting