The best disgusting jokes

Q: Why do farts smell? A: So deaf people can enjoy them, too.
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has 71.93 % from 93 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart
A haggard old lady rides in a fancy hotel's elevator. On the second floor, a beautiful woman steps on and arrogantly says to the old lady, "Georgio, $100 an ounce." On the next floor, an equally beautiful women steps on and says, "Chanel, $150 an ounce." The old lady's floor approaches and as the doors open, she bends over, farts and says, "Broccoli, 49 cents a pound."
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has 71.86 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: age, disgusting, fart, money, women
Q: What do you get when you mix beans and onions? A: Tear gas.
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has 71.76 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, food
As she lay there dozing next to me a voice inside my head kept saying, "Relax, you are not the first doctor to sleep with one of his patients." But another voice kept saying, "Howard, you are a veterinarian."
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has 71.61 % from 491 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, doctor, sex
You might be a redneck if you think taking a bubble bath starts with eating beans for dinner.
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has 71.56 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, food, redneck
Take a squirt gun into the rest room stall next to someone and shoot little drops over the wall every couple of seconds while pretending to pee.
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has 71.43 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: April fools, disgusting
Q: How is a pussy like a grapefruit? A: The best ones squirt when you eat them.
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has 71.29 % from 227 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
What's green and smells like pork? Kermit's finger.
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has 71.25 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
A vacuum salesman goes door-to-door in a new neighborhood. When a woman answers the door at the first house, the salesman walks right in and drops cow patties on her floor. He says, "Ma'am, just to show you how confident I am in the quality of my vacuums, I'll eat whatever the vacuum doesn't pick up." The woman smiles and asks, "Could I get you some ketchup with that?" The salesman scoffs confidently and says, "I assure you my vacuums have more power than any other on the market today!" The woman replies, "Well, that may be so, but we just moved in and the electricity isn't turned on yet."
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has 71.25 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Did you hear what the blonde who was opening a new bar said when her lawyer explained to her that she needed a liquor license?  "Oh, it's not gonna be THAT kind of a bar. That's disgusting!"
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has 71.25 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: bar, blonde, disgusting, lawyer