The best food jokes

Gordan Ramsey:Theres more smoke in this kitchen than snopp dogg tour bus.
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has 72.70 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, food, life, music
Q: Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato? A: The lettuce was a "head" and the tomato was trying to "ketchup"!
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has 72.57 % from 214 votes. More jokes about: food, sport
Chuck Norris can pour a pancake so thin that it only has one side.
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has 72.48 % from 120 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Every resturant has a drive thru when you're riding shotgun with Chuck Norris.
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has 72.48 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Yo mamma is so fat when she tried to go to McDonald's she tripped over Wendy's and landed on Burger King.
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has 72.05 % from 253 votes. More jokes about: fat, food, insulting, Yo mama
A nursing assistant, a floor nurse and a charge nurse from a small nursing home were taking a lunch break in the break room. In walks a lady dressed in silk scarves and wearing large polished-stone jewelry. "I am Gina the Great," stated the lady. "I am so pleased with the way you have taken care of my aunt that I will now grant the next three wishes!" With a wave of her hand and a puff of smoke, the room was filled with flowers, fruit and bottles of drink, proving that she did have the power to grant wishes before any of the nurses could think otherwise. The nurses quickly argued among themselves as to which one would ask for the first wish. Speaking up, the nursing assistant wished first. "I wish I were on a tropical island beach, with single, well-built men feeding me fruit and tending to my every need." With a puff of smoke, the nursing assistant was gone. The floor nurse went next. "I wish I were rich and retired, and spending my days in my own warm cabin at a ski resort with well-groomed men feeding me cocoa and doughnuts." With a puff of smoke, she too was gone. "Now, what is the last wish?" asked the lady. The charge nurse said, "I want those two back on the floor at the end of the lunch break."
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has 72.05 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: communication, food, genie, nurse, work
What do the spice girls and a pack of M+Ms have in common? There are assorted colors, but they all taste the same.
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has 72.04 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: food, music, women
What do you call a baby potato? A small fry.
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has 72.04 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: baby, food
Walking through Chinatown, a tourist is fascinated with all the Chinese restaurants, shops, signs and banners. He turns a corner and sees a building with the sign, "Hans Olaffsen’s Laundry." "Hans Olaffsen?", he muses. "How the heck does that fit in here?" So he walks into the shop and sees an old Chinese gentleman behind the counter. The tourist asks, "How did this place get a name like 'Hans Olaffsen’s Laundry?'" The old man answers, "Is name of owner." The tourist asks, "Well, who and where is the owner?" "Me, is right here," replies the old man. "You? How did you ever get a name like Hans Olaffsen?" "Is simple," says the old man. "Many, many year ago when come to this country, was stand in line at Documentation Center. Man in front was big blonde Swede. Lady look at him and go, 'What your name?' He say, 'Hans Olaffsen.' Then she look at me and go, 'What your name?' I say, 'Sem Ting.'"
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has 71.99 % from 372 votes. More jokes about: asian, blonde, food, life
Q: What do you call a Democratic buffet? A: A free for all.
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has 71.90 % from 97 votes. More jokes about: democrat, food, money, political
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