How can you help a starving cannibal?
Give him a helping hand.
Vote:
While I was out to lunch, my coworker answered my phone and told the caller that I would be back in 20 minutes.
The woman asked, "Is that 20 minutes Central Standard Time?"
Chicken to turkey: "Only Thanksgiving and Christmas? You're lucky, with us it's any Sunday."
Q: What do you call fake spaghetti?
A: "I'm pasta."
Vote:
Q: What is the worst thing about a vegetable?
A: Spitting them back up in a wheelchair.
Vote:
"Little Johnny, why does your little sister cry?"
"Because I helped her."
"But that is a good thing! What did you help her with?"
"I helped her eat her gummy bears."
Vote:
Q: Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato?
A: The lettuce was a "head" and the tomato was trying to "ketchup"!
Two lawyers arrive at the pub and ordered a couple of drinks. They then take sandwiches from their briefcases and began to eat.
Seeing this, the angry publican approaches them and says, 'Excuse me, but you cannot eat your own sandwiches in here!'
The two look at each other, shrug and exchange sandwiches.
Girl, you should sell hotdogs, because you already know how to make a wiener stand!
Yo mamma is so fat when she tried to go to McDonald's she tripped over Wendy's and landed on Burger King.