The best food jokes

Chuck Norris put corns in the Milky Way and eat them at his breakfast.
Vote: has 73.52 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
This elderly couple is sitting on a park bench in front of a large pond. On the other side of the pond are vendors sell all types of food stuff. The wife turns to hubby and says, "I could really go for an ice cream cone." Hubby replies, "Well, I'll go get you one." Wife says, "But, you'll forget, you better write it down." Hubby replies, "No I won't; what do you want?" Wife says, "Get me a strawberry cone with chocolate sprinkles." Hubby replies, "Okay, strawberry cone with chocolate sprinkles. See, I'll remember. Several hours pass and, finally, the hubby returns. The wife asks him, "What took you so long, did you get lost?" The hubby replies, "No, and I got what you wanted." The wife opens the bag to discover a cheeseburger and fries! Wife says, "I knew you you should have written the order down." Hubby says, "What do you mean - every thing is there." To which the wife replies, "No, it's not... look, you forgot the pickles!"
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More jokes about: food, memory, old people, time
Yo mama cooking so bad, the flies chipped for a screen door!
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More jokes about: animal, food, Yo mama
Are your legs made of Nutella? Because I'd love to spread them!
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More jokes about: chocolate, dirty, flirt, food, sex
Spilled milk cries over Chuck Norris.
Vote: has 72.77 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Chuck Norris can peel an orange with his eyelids, but he rarely needs Vitamin C.
Vote: has 72.71 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Chuck Norris can eat rice with one chop stick.
Vote: has 72.71 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
A man wanted to become a monk so he went to the monastery and talked to the head monk. The head monk said, "You must take a vow of silence and can only say two words every three years." The man agreed and after the first 3 years, the head monk came to him and said, "What are your two words?" "Food cold!" the man replied. Three more years went by and the head monk came to him and said "What are your two words?" "Robe dirty!" the man exclaimed. Three more years went by and the head monk came to him and said, "What are your two words?" "I quit!" said the man. "Well," the head monk replied, "I am not surprised. You have done nothing but complain ever since you got here!"
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More jokes about: food, men, work
Customer: "Waiter, is this a lamb chop or pork chop?" Waiter: "Can’t you tell the difference by taste?" Customer: "No, I can’t." Waiter: "Then does it really matter?"
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More jokes about: food, life
What did the egg say to the boiling water? "How can you expect me to get hard so fast? I just got laid a minute ago."
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More jokes about: food, life, time