The best food jokes

Are your legs made of Nutella? Because I'd love to spread them!
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has 72.34 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: chocolate, dirty, flirt, food, sex
Yo mama is so stupid when you asked her to grab McDonald's she brings the building home.
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has 72.27 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: communication, food, insulting, stupid, Yo mama
Where do milk shakes come from? Nervous cows.
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has 72.04 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
A man and his wife go to the doctor to see how they could improve their sex life. The doctor recommends Viagra. They come back and see him in a couple of weeks. The doctor says "how was the Viagra?" The wife says "great I love it." Husband says "I like it but it has some side effects, we're bared from McDonald's for life."
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has 71.85 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: couple, doctor, food, sex, viagra
While doing a vasectomy, the doctor slipped and cut off one of the man’s balls. To avoid a huge malpractice suit, he decided to replace the missing testicle with a pickled onion. Several weeks later, the patient returned for a checkup. “How’s your sex life?” asked the doctor. “Pretty good,” the man said, to the doctor’s obvious relief. But then the patient added, “I’ve had some strange side effects that are causing serious problems.” “What’s that?” the doctor asked anxiously. “Well, every time I urinate, my eyes water.” “Hmm,” said the doctor, thoughtfully. “That’s not all,” continued the patient. “When my wife does me orally, she gets heartburn.” “Hmm,” said the doctor, as his face reddened. “It gets worse, Doc. Now, every time I pass a hamburger stand….I get an erection!”
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has 71.80 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: dirty, doctor, food, life, sex
Q: What do you get when you mix beans and onions? A: Tear gas.
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has 71.76 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, food
Two lawyers arrive at the pub and ordered a couple of drinks. They then take sandwiches from their briefcases and began to eat. Seeing this, the angry publican approaches them and says, 'Excuse me, but you cannot eat your own sandwiches in here!' The two look at each other, shrug and exchange sandwiches.
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has 71.74 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: food, lawyer
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first orders a beer, the second orders half a beer, the third orders a quarter of a beer, and so on. After the seventh order, the bartender pours two beers and says, "You fellas ought to know your limits."
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has 71.70 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, food, math
What kind of bees make milk instead of honey? Boobies.
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has 71.64 % from 152 votes. More jokes about: animal, food, women
Sunday school teacher asks Johnny, "Come now, Little Johnny, tell me the truth, do you say your prayers before eating?" Little Johnny smiles proudly, "No Miss, there's no need, my mom cooks really well."
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has 71.53 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: food, little Johnny, school, teacher
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