The best food jokes

A tomato walks into work and a potato says: "Hello, Tomatoe..." He responds: "My name is not Tomatoe, it's just Tomato. How would you like it if I called you "Potatoe"? "Well, that would just be weird because my name is Rick!"
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has 72.31 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: communication, food, work
Starbucks is offering a new drink to honor Nancy Pelosi. They call it the "fullacrapuccino".
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has 72.14 % from 77 votes. More jokes about: business, customer service, democrat, food, political
I decided to grab a burger at a drive-thru. There were no cars in sight, so I rolled up to the pay window. "We're still serving breakfast. And you have to order at the speaker," the clerk scolded. I drove all the way around the building to the squawk box and ordered a breakfast sandwich. "I'm sorry," she said, "we are now serving lunch."
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has 72.04 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: car, customer service, food, mean, time
Sunday school teacher asks Johnny, "Come now, Little Johnny, tell me the truth, do you say your prayers before eating?" Little Johnny smiles proudly, "No Miss, there's no need, my mom cooks really well."
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has 71.88 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: food, little Johnny, school, teacher
"Little Johnny, why does your little sister cry?" "Because I helped her."  "But that is a good thing! What did you help her with?" "I helped her eat her gummy bears."
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has 71.80 % from 129 votes. More jokes about: food, kids, little Johnny
I was eating and enjoying my food when a man entered into the restaurant where i was eating with a brief case. I guess he is a politician cause his dressing and pot belly portrays it. He walked and sat down as every body looked at him. Suddenly a woman came to him and started crying. The woman knelt down and told him that her children die of hunger since her husband died. This man opened the brief case and gave this woman five thousand dollars. The woman jumped up and left the scene in happiness. I was still watching when another man started crying and came to him. He knelt down and begged him that he need a money to establish a business. This man brought out three hundred thousand dollars cheque and gave it to this man. This time, i started murmuring and practicing on the lie i will blow to have my own national cake. I started crying and came to the man. Immediately i knelt down, I heard "Cut! cut! cut!". I turned and saw the laughing director of the movie. Shame almost killed me.
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has 71.56 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: food, money, political
Yo mama is so stupid when you asked her to grab McDonald's she brings the building home.
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has 71.53 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: communication, food, insulting, stupid, Yo mama
Girl, you should sell hotdogs, because you already know how to make a wiener stand!
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has 71.45 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, flirt, food, sex
You might be a redneck if you think taking a bubble bath starts with eating beans for dinner.
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has 71.38 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, food, redneck
Walking through Chinatown, a tourist is fascinated with all the Chinese restaurants, shops, signs and banners. He turns a corner and sees a building with the sign, "Hans Olaffsen’s Laundry." "Hans Olaffsen?", he muses. "How the heck does that fit in here?" So he walks into the shop and sees an old Chinese gentleman behind the counter. The tourist asks, "How did this place get a name like 'Hans Olaffsen’s Laundry?'" The old man answers, "Is name of owner." The tourist asks, "Well, who and where is the owner?" "Me, is right here," replies the old man. "You? How did you ever get a name like Hans Olaffsen?" "Is simple," says the old man. "Many, many year ago when come to this country, was stand in line at Documentation Center. Man in front was big blonde Swede. Lady look at him and go, 'What your name?' He say, 'Hans Olaffsen.' Then she look at me and go, 'What your name?' I say, 'Sem Ting.'"
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has 71.38 % from 315 votes. More jokes about: asian, blonde, food, life
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