The best food jokes

Chuck Norris doesn't take the cake, the cake sees Chuck Norris and begs to be devoured.
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What happened when the cannibal ate the speaking clock? It repeated on him.
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More jokes about: food, life, time
Q: Why did the butcher get fired from his job? A: He was caught beating his meat.
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More jokes about: food, work
Chuck Norris once won the title of Iron Chef by cooking instant ramen noodles.
Vote: has 67.78 % from 36 votes. Send joke:
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Chuck Norris once soaked his beard in carbonated water. The result is now sold as Red Bull.
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Roses are red lemons are sour. Open your legs and give me an hour.
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More jokes about: dirty, food, poems, sex, time
First soldier: “Pass me the chocolate pudding, would you?” Second soldier: “No way, Jose!” First soldier: “Whyever not?” Second soldier: “It’s against regulations to help another soldier to dessert!”
Vote: has 67.69 % from 51 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: food, military
If it looks like chicken tastes like chicken and smells like chicken and Chuck Norris says it's beef then it's beef.
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More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
There were these two bums and they were hungry when they came across road kill. The first bum went down to eat it when he looked up at his friend and said, "Oh I'm sorry, would you like some?" He replied, "No I think I'll wait." So they continue down the road and the first bum said, "Look - some more road kill, I'm still hungry. How about you?" His friend replied, "No, not yet, I think I'll wait." The first bum ate the road kill. Shortly after, his eyes rolled back and he puked the whole thing back up on the street. Seconds later, his friend dove in and ate every last slickery drop of the puke. The first bum said, "I thought you weren't hungry?" His friend replied, "I was always hungry, I just wanted a warm meal."
Vote: has 67.68 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: death, disgusting, food
The houseman invited over his boss and partners, for lunch. With them, his little 5year-old daughter was there. "Don’t you want to say the prayers before lunch, so Our Holly Father give us his blessings?," asks the father. "But... I don’t know what to say...," the little girl admits. "Just say what you heard your mommy say last time inside the kitchen!," said her mother to help her. And the girl: "Oh, God! Why in this life, my husband must invite all these people for lunch?"
Vote: has 67.68 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: food, god, husband, kids, life


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