The best food jokes

What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: food
Did you hear about the guy they found dead with his head in his cornflakes? The police thought it was a cereal killer.
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: cop, death, food, life
Q: What do you get when you cross donkey DNA with an onion? A: A piece of ass that will bring tears to your eyes.
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Why did the farmer put brandy in the cow's food? He wanted to raised stewed beef.
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!". The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past ten minutes!"
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has 64.77 % from 205 votes. More jokes about: food, men, sex, time, women
A man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at a fast-food restaurant. He noticed that they had ordered just one meal, and as he watched, the older gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then counted out the fries until each had half of them. The old man then began to eat, and his wife sat watching, with her hands folded in her lap. The young man decided to ask if they would let him buy another meal for them so that they didn’t have to split theirs. The old gentleman said, “Oh, no. We’ve been married 50 years, and everything has always been and will always be shared 50-50.” The young man asked the wife if she was going to eat, to which she replied, “Not yet. It’s his turn to use our teeth.”
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: food, marriage, old people
Why did the cannibal eat the tightrope walker? He wanted a balanced meal.
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has 64.72 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: black humor, food
Your legs are like an Oreo Cookie - I wanna split them and eat all the good stuff in the middle.
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has 64.59 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt, food, sex
Yo mama so poor she bragged about the time she almost ate at a restaraunt.
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has 64.51 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: food, insulting, money, Yo mama
First Cannibal: "Have you seen the dentist?" Second Cannibal: "Yes, he filled my teeth at dinner time."
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has 64.34 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: black humor, doctor, food
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