The best food jokes

Customer: "Waiter, there’s a dead beetle in my soup." Waiter: "Yes sir, they are not very good swimmers."
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has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, food
A blonde enters a library. She goes to the counter and says "I'll like a cheeseburger, fries, and a cola." The librarian says "Ma'am this is library." So the blonde leans in and whispers "I'd like a cheeseburger, fries, and a cola."
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has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: blonde, business, food, stupid
One day a blonde went to a sea food restaurant and saw the tank where they kept the lobsters. She took pity on these creatures and hid them in her purse. Later she went to the woods to set the poor animals free.
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has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, food, stupid
Q: Why are Germans bad cooks? A: The only good one killed himself.
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has 65.13 % from 154 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, food, Hitler, work
Starbucks is offering a new drink to honor Nancy Pelosi. They call it the "fullacrapuccino".
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has 65.10 % from 119 votes. More jokes about: business, customer service, democrat, food, political
I was walking home last night when I noticed an old drunk staggering along the road. He passed a woman who was walking a young child. "Lady", said the drunk, "that's the ugliest kid I've ever seen. Damn, that is one ugly child!." As the drunk wandered off, the lady burst into tears. Just then, a mailman came to her rescue. "What's the matter, madam?" he asked. "I've just been horribly insulted" she sobbed. "There there," said the mailman, reaching into his pocket. "Dry your eyes with this tissue, and here's a banana for the chimp"
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has 64.93 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, food, kids, ugly
Spilled milk cries over Chuck Norris.
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has 64.89 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Three guys are alone on a desert island: an engineer, a biologist and an economist. They are starving and don't have a thing to eat, but somehow they find a can of beans on the shore. The engineer says: "Let's hit the can with a rock until it opens." The biologist has another idea: "No. We should wait for a while. Erosion will do the job." Finally, the economist says: "Let's assume that we have a can opener".
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has 64.89 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: desert island, food, work
Chuck Norris's favourite drink is diamond juice, which he squeezes out of raw diamonds with his bare hands.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Usain Bolt only began running when he heard, Chuck Norris was in Jamaica shooting a commercial for Red Bull.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, food
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