A preacher's wife goes to the butcher. The butcher asks if she'd like to try some damn ham. The preacher's wife is shocked. The butcher explains that "Dam Ham" is the brand name of the meat and shows her the packaging with the beaver and dam logo. That night, the preacher asks, "What's for dinner?" His wife says she bought some damn ham from the butcher. The preacher scolds his wife for using such language in their home. She explains the "Dam Ham brand name and their logo. At the dinner table, the preacher asks his 16-year-old son to pass him the "Dam Ham." The son replies, "I'll pass the damn ham if you pass me the muthaf**kin' mashed potatoes."
What does a British potato say when it thinks something is wonderful? It's mashing!
Q: What is the diffrence between a black guy and a pizza A: A pizza can feed a family of four.
Yo' Mama is so skanky, when the waiter brought out her strip steak, she asked where to tuck the dollar bills.
Chuck Norris invented hot sauce. To put on his peppers.
What do you call a take-out low-calorie meal for a cowboy? A Saddle Light Dish.
The cake is a lie, Chuck Norris is THE TRUTH.
Knock Knock. Who's there! Ice cream! Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't let me in!
Yo' Mama is so fat, she uses the refrigerator for her lunch box.
A kid walks up to his teacher and says "When is lunch." The teacher said "When its my break." "Your break for what? the kid asks. "My break up" the teacher said.