Chuck Norris smells what the Rock is cooking... because the Rock is Chuck Norris' personal chef.
Did you hear about the man who ate nothing but oats every day? He fell in love with the Grand National winner!
Chuck Norris boils an egg by holding it.
When do cannibals cook you? On Fried-days.
Be careful never to let a blonde have a coffee break... It takes too long to retrain her afterwards!
One elf said to another elf, "We had Grandma for Christmas dinner". And the other elf said, "Really? We had turkey!"
When I offer you food it's just because my mother raised me right. As a firend, read the truth in my eyes and politely decline.
Yo' Mama is like a bag of chips: Fri-to-lay.
Chuck Norris invented hot sauce. To put on his peppers.
The cake is a lie, Chuck Norris is THE TRUTH.