Q: What day does an Easter egg hate the most? A: Fry-days.
Did you hear about the Easter egg hunt for the Alzheimer's patients? They hid their own eggs!
"Why are you studying your Easter candy?" "I'm trying to decide which came first-the chocolate chicken or the chocolate egg!"
Q: Why won't Easter eggs go out at night? A: They don't want to get "beat up".
What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that was out in the sun too long? A runny bunny.
What do you call a rabbit who works in a bakery? A yeaster bunny.
A Texan, a Russian and a New Yorker go to a restaurant in London. The waiter tells them, "Excuse me if you were going to order the steak, I'm afraid there's a shortage due to the mad cow disease." The Texan says, "What's a shortage?" The Russian says, "What's a steak?" The New Yorker says, "What's 'excuse me'?"
Inside a Best Buy store. Customer: "Can you help me? I'm looking for a shredder." Coworker: "We have all types of shredders. What will you be shredding primarily?" Customer: "Collard greens."
Q: Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs? A: He doesn't want anyone to know he's f**king chickens.
I was walking home last night when I noticed an old drunk staggering along the road. He passed a woman who was walking a young child. "Lady", said the drunk, "that's the ugliest kid I've ever seen. Damn, that is one ugly child!." As the drunk wandered off, the lady burst into tears. Just then, a mailman came to her rescue. "What's the matter, madam?" he asked. "I've just been horribly insulted" she sobbed. "There there," said the mailman, reaching into his pocket. "Dry your eyes with this tissue, and here's a banana for the chimp"
Q: Why was the Easter Bunny so upset? A: He was having a bad hare day!