Q: What's the difference between apple pie and pussy? A: You can eat Granmas apple pie.
Q: How do you know Noah was a White man? A: No nigger could stay on a boat for 40 days without eating the chickens!
Yo mama so poor when i went to her house and picked up a paper plate she yelled "Not my good china!"
Dad tries to persuade his son to eat the egg he has prepared for him: "Eat your egg my child to become as big as daddy!" "I do not want," says the little one. "Eat it my boy to become strong and powerful." "I’m telling you, no!" insists the youngest. "My dear son eat your egg to make your bird grow." And the mom from the inside "George, you eat the egg… I’ll make burgers for the kid!"
A 5 year old and a 3 year old are upstairs in their bedroom "You know what?" says the 5 year old, "I think it's about time we started swearing." The 3 year old nods his head in approval, so the 5 year old says, "When we go downstairs for breakfast I'm gonna swear first, then you swear after me, ok?" "Ok" the 3 year old, agrees with enthusiasm. The mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 5 year old what he wants for breakfast. "Shit mum, I don't know, I suppose I'll have some Fruit Loops." (WHACK...she spanks him) He flew out of his chair, tumbled across the kitchen floor, got up, and ran upstairs crying his eyes out. She looked at the 3 year old and asked with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?" "I don't know mum, but it won't be fucking Fruit Loops."
Yo' Mama is like a bag of chips: Fri-to-lay.
What did one dairy cow say to another? Got milk?
How do you know when you re eating rabbit stew? When it has hares in it.
If a hungry shark is after you, what should you feed it? Jawbreakers.
Champions eat Wheaties for breakfast. Chuck Norris eats Champions for breakfast.