One elf said to another elf, "We had Grandma for Christmas dinner".
And the other elf said, "Really? We had turkey!"
Q: What's the difference between a freezer and a fag?
A: A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
Vote:
Customer: "Waiter, there’s a fly in my soup."
Waiter: "That’s all right sir, he won’t drink much."
Chuck Norris can eat food while his mouth is closed.
Vote:
Q: What happens when you feed gun powder to a chicken?
A: Egg-splosion
Cannibal Son: Mom, I don't like my brother anymore.
Cannibal Mother: You shut up and eat!
Vote:
Not only CAN Chuck have his cake and eat it too, he WILL.
Vote:
Q: Where do cowboys cook their meals?
A: On the range.
Teacher: "If you bought 8 hotdogs,9 cheese burgers and 7 fillet o fishes and you ate 8 hotdogs 9 cheese burger and 7 fillet o fish what do you have at the end?"
Little Johnny: "A bad blatter issue."
How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight?
Have YOU ever seen a rabbit with glasses?