The snake was punished because Chuck Norris tempted it to ate the apple.
What do you get when you cross a bunny with an orange?
A pip squeak.
The cannibal priest told his flock to close their eyes and say grace.
"For whosoever we are about to eat, may the Lord make us truly thankful."
Q: What is the difference between a pizza and a women?
A: The pizza can be eaten but the women can't!
What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection?
A quarter pounder with cheese
What do cows read at the breakfast table?
The moospaper.
A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about.
He asks his father for advice.
The father replies: "My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family, and philosophy."
The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain.
Ice cream sodas in front of them, they stare at each other for a long time, as the boy's nervousness builds.
He remembers his father's advice, and chooses the first topic.
He asks the girl: "Do you like spinach?" She says "No," and the silence returns.
After a few more uncomfortable minutes, the boy thinks of his father's suggestion and turns to the second item on the list.
He asks, "Do you have a brother?" Again, the girl says "No" and there is silence once again.
The boy then plays his last card.
He thinks of his father's advice and asks the girl the following question: "If you had a brother, would he like spinach?"
Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'"
Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken."
Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?"
Mother: "Because we need the eggs."
Q: What happens when you feed gun powder to a chicken?
A: Egg-splosion
Q: Whats worse then finding half a worm in your apple?
A: The Holocaust.