The best food jokes

Cannibal Son: Mom, I don't like my brother anymore. Cannibal Mother: You shut up and eat!

Chuck Norris knows what's eating Gilbert Grape.

How did the cannibal turn over a new leaf? He became a vegetarian.

Q: What did the Arctic wolf ask in the restaurant? A: "Are these lemmings fresh off the tundra?"

Q: What do blondes eat to increase their breast size? A: Silicone chips.

My friend's dad went to Hungary. I asked her, "Was your dad hungry in Hungary?"

How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight? Have YOU ever seen a rabbit with glasses?

Little Johnny was always late for school. When asked why he said he had to eat his popsicle. Without thinking the teacher told him to eat half his popsicle and save the other half in his pocket. Next day Johnny was on time. The teacher had history class. "What are the people in Asia called", she asked a student. "Asians", said the student. "What are the people in Africa called". "Africans" said the student. Then she asked Johnny, "What are the people in Europe called", but Johnny didn't know so the girl behind him whispered, "Euro pean." To that Johnny said, "No I'm not, that's just my popsicle."

Wanna go on an 'ate' with me? I'll give you the 'D' later.

"If we don't change the direction we're going, we're likely to end up at the wrong end." "People who go out of their way to help others have great taste." "An eye for an eye leaves everybody blind, but not hungry." "Don't give up though the pace seems slow, you may succeed at another morgue." "A journey of a hundred trillion cells begins with a single nibble." "The only difference between a big shot and a little shot is that the big shot takes longer to chew." "It's all right to have little butterflies in your stomach. In fact, I'd say a trip to the elementary school play is a wonderful idea." "You don't know what your appetite can get away with until you try. Or are tried." "If you carry your childhood with you, you should probably go the bathroom soon." "Never keep up with Joneses. Have them over for dinner." "Let your hook always be cast. In the pool where you least expect it, will be a very startled swimmer."