The best food jokes

Chuck Norris once squeezed an M&M so hard that it turned into a Skittle.
Vote:
has 49.93 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Why didn't the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster? Because he was a commentator.
Vote:
has 49.79 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: food, marriage
What does an annoying pepper do? It get's jalapeño face
Vote:
has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: food
Yo mama is so skinny that she eats a nut and thoughts that she’s pregnant...
Vote:
has 49.51 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: food, Yo mama
Yo' Mama is so flat, the last time she felt a breast was in a KFC bucket.
Vote:
has 49.51 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: food, insulting, Yo mama
There was a black guy, white guy, and a Mexican on a ship. The ship was sinking so the black guy said, "quick throw off anything we don't need." The Mexican threw off tacos, the black guy thre off fried chicken and the white guy threw off the black guy and the Mexican.
Vote:
has 49.51 % from 195 votes. More jokes about: black people, food, mexican, racist, white people
Little Johnny was always late for school. When asked why he said he had to eat his popsicle. Without thinking the teacher told him to eat half his popsicle and save the other half in his pocket. Next day Johnny was on time. The teacher had history class. "What are the people in Asia called", she asked a student. "Asians", said the student. "What are the people in Africa called". "Africans" said the student. Then she asked Johnny, "What are the people in Europe called", but Johnny didn't know so the girl behind him whispered, "Euro pean." To that Johnny said, "No I'm not, that's just my popsicle."
Vote:
has 49.41 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: ethnic, food, little Johnny, school, teacher
Why was the cannibal looking peeky? Because he had just eaten a Chinese dog!
Vote:
has 49.36 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal, black humor, dog, food
Chuck Norris can eat peanut butter with a straw.
Vote:
has 49.30 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
A Gujarati Funeral… A family in Gujarat got simply puzzled when the coffin of their dead mother (Puj. Ba) arrived from the US. It was sent by one of the Daughters. The dead body was very tightly squeezed inside the coffin, with no space left in it when they opened the lid; they found a letter on top addressed to all her brothers and sisters: Dear Chandrakantbhai, Arvindbhai, Smitaben & Varsha, I am sending Puj. Ba’s dead body to you, since it was her last wish that she should be cremated in the compound of our ancestral home in Kadhywad, GUJARAT, India. Sorry, I could not come, all of my paid leaves got consumed. You will find inside the coffin, under Ba’s body, 5 cans of cheese, 10 packets of Tobler chocolates, 8 packets of Badam and few items for Kids. Please divide these among all of you. Near Ba’s feet, you will find a new pair of Reebok shoes (size 10) for Mohan. There are also 2 pairs of shoes for Radha’s and Lakshmi’s sons. Hope the sizes are correct! Ba is wearing 6 American T-Shirts. The large size is for Mohan and rest you can decide. The 2 new Jeans that Ba is wearing are for the boys. The Swiss watch that Reema wanted is on Ba’s left wrist. Shanta masi, Ba is wearing the necklace, earrings and ring that you asked for. Please take it. The few pairs of white cotton socks that Ba is wearing must be divided among all the Nephews. Please distribute all these above items fairly & equally. Yours loving sister, Anubhavi P.S.: If anything more needed, let me know soon as Bapuji is also not feeling too well now a days…
Vote:
has 49.00 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: death, food, funeral, life
<<<52535455
More jokes →
Page 52 of 72.