When Chuck Norris bakes cookies for his enemies, he adds his own secret ingredient to make a special taste to it. Its called "defeat".
Q: What does an Irishman get after eating Italian food? A: Gaelic breath.
Chuck Norris was once so famished, he ate Turkey. The country there now is only an impostor.
Chuck Norris puts all of his baskets in one egg.
Chuck Norris can eat the inside of an orange without peeling it.
Q: What's the difference between a freezer and a fag? A: A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
Chuck Norris's version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.
Yo mama so fat she puts insurance on her food.
Wheaties is the breakfast of champions, not for Chuck Norris. He eats Chucky Charms, which contains diamonds, sulfuric acid, and radioactive uranium.
We're like hot chocolate and marshmallows... You're hot and I wanna be on top of you.