Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'"
Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken."
Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?"
Mother: "Because we need the eggs."
Chuck Norris scares cows so bad, milk comes out their nose.
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Chuck Norris likes his steaks still mooing.
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When Chuck Norris eats dinner at a restaurant, the wait staff tips him.
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Some people like to eat frogs' legs.
Chuck Norris likes to eat lizard legs.
Hence, snakes.
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A farmer was driving along the road with a load of fertilizer.
A little boy, playing in front of his house, saw him and called, "What've you got in your truck?"
"Fertilizer," the farmer replied.
"What are you going to do with it?" asked the little boy.
"Put it on strawberries," answered the farmer.
"You ought to live here," the little boy advised him.
"We put sugar and cream on ours."
Chuck Norris does not buy ground beef, he just takes a whole cow, runs it through his beard, and fully cooked hamburgers come out.
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How do you lead a horse to water?
With lots of carrots.
Why did the gray whale go on a diet?
Because he wasn't a Fin whale.
Chuck Norris doesnt eat lunch, he drinks dinner.
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