If Chuck Norris was here in the Philippines, there would be no hostage crisis. He eats hostage-takers for breakfast!
What is a cannibal's favorite food? Baked Beings.
What did the mother vampire say to her daughter when she picked up a tampon? "Honey, no in-between meal snacks!"
Little Johnny took sex ed and every day when little Johnny would come in from school he'll tell his dad for learning sex ed well one day we'll just come in and he said that I got thrown out sex ed Lil Johnny's daddy says how do you get thrown out sex ed Little Johnny said well Dad I got in trouble for eating during class.
Yo mama is so skinny that she eats a nut and thoughts that she’s pregnant...
What do you get when you eat a prune pizza? Pizzeria!
Q: What's the difference between pea soup and roast beef? A: Anyone can roast beef.
What does an annoying pepper do? It get's jalapeño face
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she thinks the Wu-Tang Clan is a Japanese orange drink company.
What do you get when you cross a bunny with an orange? A pip squeak.