The best food jokes

Doctor to woman patient: "Your husband is too fond of strong coffee. You should not give it to him." Patient: "But you should see how excited he gets when I give him weak coffee."
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has 41.91 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: food, husband, marriage
What do you get if you cross a cow, a french fry, and a sofa? A cowch potato.
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has 41.91 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
As the family gathered for a big dinner together, the youngest son announced that he had just signed up at an army recruiter's office. There were audible gasps around the table, then some laughter, as his older brothers shared their disbelief that he could handle this new situation. "Oh, come on, quit joking," snickered one. "You didn't really do that, did you?" "You would never get through basic training," scoffed another. The new recruit looked to his mother for help, but she was just gazing at him. When she finally spoke, she simply asked, "Do you really plan to make your own bed every morning?"
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has 41.85 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: food, military
Chuck Norris likes his meat rare, so he eats unicorns.
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has 41.85 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
Chuck Norris has his own protien powder. The ingriedients include: cocoa powder, stem cells, dodo egg protien, enriched uranium, LSD, and Vin Diesel.
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has 41.85 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Chuck Norris eats black holes for breakfast. They taste like chicken.
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has 41.85 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
Chuck Norris doesn't pick up his food to eat it. He commands it to enter his mouth.
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has 41.85 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
What does a blonde see when she looks into a box of cheerios? Donut Seeds.
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has 41.84 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: blonde, food
What are Women Really Thinking? So many men, so few who can afford me. Coffee, chocolate, men ... some things are just better rich. Don't treat me any differently than you would the Queen. Guys have feelings too, But ... who cares? And your point is? Next mood swing: 6 minutes. If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen.
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has 41.82 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: food, marriage, money, time
Chuck Norris was hungry so he went to eat a hotdog. When he saw it giggled and said: "What a bad luck! Look what a part of a dog I've to eat!"
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has 41.57 % from 92 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Chuck Norris, dog, food, morbid
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