Chuck Norris has his own protien powder.
The ingriedients include: cocoa powder, stem cells, dodo egg protien, enriched uranium, LSD, and Vin Diesel.
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Chuck Norris doesn't pick up his food to eat it.
He commands it to enter his mouth.
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What does a blonde see when she looks into a box of cheerios? Donut Seeds.
Bacons' favorite smell is Chuck Norris.
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Q: Why dont blacks celibrate thanksgiving?
A: KFC isnt open on holidays.
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My friend's dad went to Hungary.
I asked her, "Was your dad hungry in Hungary?"
Yo' Mama is so fat, she keeps her diaphragm in a pizza box.
The smoothie was invented when Chuck Norris needed information from a banana.
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A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world.
Watch while I prove it to you.”
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do you want, son?”
The boy takes the quarters and leaves. “What did I tell you?” said the barber.
“That kid never learns!” Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store.
“Hey, son! May I ask you a question?
Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?”
The boy licked his cone and replied, “Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!”
Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin are having dinner.
Trump orders a steak, and Putin orders the roast duck.
The waiter, however, gets their plates mixed up.
Trump does not wait, but rather just starts digging in.
"Wow," Putin says. "Your hands make my duck look bigger."
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